If you opened the SMART Living Blog post email last week you probably noticed it was different. Rather than publish a full article like usual, I decided to take a short trip down to Baja Mexico with Thom and enjoy myself. And while that might not seem radical if you haven’t followed SMART Living 365 for long. But it was actually the first time in over six years that I’ve given myself permission to not post an article. And guess what? The world did not collapse and (thankfully!) you all did not unsubscribe. What it did do was allow to me pause and consider why I have felt so driven to stick to such a strict self-imposed schedule. More importantly, it reminded me that my definition of success and happiness as I enter my third-act of life is the guidepost that I want to follow at the present time. And perhaps my thoughts on this are something all of us can use regardless of our age.
Something about my personality allows me to make a plan and stick with it. Most times that practice serves me very well. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve converted a bad habit into something good from this peculiarity. The biggest example I have is when I wanted to stop smoking over 35 years ago. I really enjoyed, (yes I’m one of those strange people who actually liked to smoke) was getting up in the morning, having a cigarette with my coffee, and reading the newspaper. So rather than repeat what I had been doing for the previous 15 years, I instead got up, put on my tennis shoes, and took my dog for a long walk. And yes, 35+ years later I am still walking about 2+ miles nearly every day. I am certain that my deeply ingrained walking habit keeps me healthy and strong all these years later. So certainly, my strict adherence to a created schedule can benefit me tremendously.
It can also cause me a lot of grief. Of course I’m not talking about writing here on SMART Living or publishing my books, because they are actually some of the most rewarding and meaningful experiences in my life. I don’t ever want to give up writing. But what I do want is to never be afraid to closely scrutinize my habits and make changes when necessary. Let’s face it, if we aren’t mindful of our own thoughts and habits, we too often become “comfortably numb” to the routines that make up our lives. So, the grief I’m talking about is locking myself into a behavior just because it is something I decided at some point was a good thing to do. But things change. I change. By the same token some of our actions need to change too.
So I suppose it is no accident that this morning I was listening to a podcast interview by the author, business entrepreneur, and blogger Seth Godin. He reminded me that my former definition of success has dramatically transformed in my lifetime. Years ago I watched silly shows like Lifestyles of the Rich And Famous and imagined how one day I could be a bit like those that Robin Leach interviewed. Remember him? Of course, I still don’t believe that having money is the problem. What I now reject is glamorizing a lifestyle of excessive consumption and frivolous pastimes as something worthy of our time, attention and talent. I’ve outgrown such pursuits, but like Seth Godin, I’m not sure our culture has. I think it is time we did.
And one way to redefine it is by refusing to think that success is something that can be easily measured by what (or who) makes the most money, gets the most likes on Facebook, or is the most popular. It is so easy for us to compare our life and our work with what others are doing and then judge it based upon superficial observations.
Godin likes to use the example of The Beverly Hillbillies vs. Star Trek. Shows like The Beverly Hillbillies were a rating success—but did they do anything more than entertain for 30 minutes? In contrast, Star Trek struggled to find an audience. But years later we can see how it gradually transformed television programing, introduced ideas of space and technology, and changed our culture in some ways for the better. Another example Godin uses is saying, “We can survive if we eat candy for an entire day, but if we put the greenmarkets out of business along the way, all that’s left is candy.”
What this means to me as a writer and a blogger is that although I love it when people respond to the ideas I am sharing here, I resist basing my success on the number of people who subscribe or whether my blog is considered popular. As Godin suggests, I don’t want to be the “Walmart” of blogging or writing. Instead I see myself as a speciality store with a select but discriminating clientele who I consider friends.
Of course, even as I say that, I confess that I’ve “listened to the experts” far too long who promote that the only way to have a “successful” blog is to put out posts on a regular basis. Those experts also say that your blog posts are only supposed to be xxx number of words long, and that your titles have to be provocative, and that your topic has to stay within your genre. Sure those tips might be great at increasing the number of visits to a blog (becoming Walmart)—but I’m far more interested in readers who enjoy exploring new ideas, appreciate being provoked now and then, and do their best to stay positive no matter what.
Still, I get that sometimes we have to adhere to schedules, go to jobs, or follow certain routines to generate income to live and maintain our lives. But what about the rest of the time? When it comes down to it, so much of the success and happiness I’m striving to live these days has everything to do with quality, rather than quantity. My short list includes.
- Spending quality time with my beloved husband having fun and new adventures.
- Maintaining the quality of my health so that I can stay active and enjoy my life.
- Nourishing quality relationships with others who are in my “tribe.”
- Sharing quality ideas and information with those who are open and curious.
- Continuing to grow, learn and evolve into becoming the best “me” I can be.
- Doing my part to make the world a bit better because I lived.
Of course my definition of success and happiness is likely different from yours. But whatever it is, I think the search for our ongoing definitions, and redefinitions as time goes by, are vitally important. At this point I’m not sure I will continue to publish full blog posts every Friday, more Photo Blog Posts, or skip a week altogether. But whatever I choose, I want to be fearless in trying different things as I feel guided to do. While I would love it if you continue to join me, more importantly, I sincerely hope that you find and follow those messages that speak to you and remind you to live a quality life. Surely that is the SMART way for all of us to go.
Okay, your turn. How do you define success these days? Has it changed since you have gotten older? Please share your thoughts and any others in the comments below.
I love this! The fact that you are willing to consider your success outside of the “norm” is powerful. We all must examine for ourselves what these labels mean. If we all allowed the experts to tell us whats best, good or bad or right or wrong we would all be miserable. Am I right?
Hi Kathy. Because my inclination in my work life was to over-commit and to aim for perfection, I have been very careful NOT to commit to a blogging schedule. In my retirement phase of life, I am trying to learn to be more casual, open, and relaxed about time and how I spend it. Having experienced burnout, I never want to recreate the excessive busyness of my career again.
Jude
Kathy, I am a planner and love my schedule and yet, I have given myself absolute permission to miss a week of blogging or even two. I just recently started getting in the habit of posting on Sunday night, mostly because it tends to be a quiet time on the life schedule. I’ve never been a write and post person, so I tend to have 1-3 draft posts written at any time. I write and let them sit to mull over, add to, edit. If nothing is ready to post, nothing its posted. So I guess it is about quality for me as far as blogging.
And as someone stated, blogging to me is more than posting…. it’s reading and commenting as well. Sometimes I do feel I get behind on that, because when certain folks post, I do want to read… even if it’s day’s later. 🙂 When life gets busier, I comment when compelled.
I love your list of what defines success! I do believe in the past, success for me was all work related – getting projects done on time, meeting expectations, getting good reviews. Now, I think my list would replicate yours – success to me is living the retirement lifestyle I’ve envisioned.
Hi Pat! We do have a lot in common! But maybe because I’ve been blogging so long…overall over ten years on this and a former site…but I’ve gradually gotten away from feeling I HAVE to comment on every comment or visit everyone’s site every single time. Don’t get me wrong, I so very much appreciate the comments I get and it is a big part of the enjoyment of blogging, but again, if it feels like a “job” then I back away. Staying true to my commitment to post though…that’s another story! Hopefully I’m better but I still have a ways to go. Good for you for finding your way so early on. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy,
I was so glad to see that you had taken a week off…I did as well when we went sailing, but I confess to feeling a bit guilty about it.
But you are right, the world did not end. My readers and blogging friends are still there. And I have forgiven myself and moved on.
This is progress for me!!!
Hi Nancy! Yay to progress! I’m working on a blog post for this week already but we will be traveling again next month and I’m already “talking myself into the awareness” that I will take some time off. Plus, I actually really enjoy and it’s easy to just finding nice quotes and sticking them on a photos so that really both of my needs. It DOESN’T have to be all one way right? Please keep reminding me if I forget!!! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy
I am both a planner and a procrastinator! I know I have to do something but some tasks will wait until the last minute and then the anxiety increases. Coincidentally I missed my two week blog post the same weekend and like you the world did not end! In fact, I have more blog ideas over the past week, than I have had for months.
So I have decided to plan for my procrastination! I know I won’t likely pack for a trip until the night before a trip, so I am making sure that night I am not busy! I am eliminating my self imposed blog schedule and using it as a suggestion. I want quality over quantity.
I have been listening to social media experts and how often and when to post and that also causes anxiety. I am using it to promote a small business. To tell the truth, I am not enjoying the process. I am much happier networking in person and individually.
I retired in January from my cooperate job and hit the ground running with the social media. Well I need to walk not run! And my husband commented that he thought he would see more of me, not less. So I am going to start my retirement over and prioritize my time to meet the goals that are meaningful for me at this time of life.
As for success….its how I feel when I put my head on my pillow at night….no guilt on how I spent my day.
Jamie
Hi Jamie! I love the idea that you recognize you can stop and restart your retirement over and over any time you want. That is definitely freedom to me. But interesting how as a procrastinator you start feeling anxious knowing it is coming. I, on the other hand, tend to plan far in advance and then make myself anxious by doing too much when I really don’t have the time OR even want to. Yet either way we are feeling anxious and then yes, feeling guilty when it is all said and done. I think a big part of my “recovery” is just guessing my patterns in advance and then “talking myself down!” before I get anxious or guilt ridden. How about you? 🙂 ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, Yes, I catch myself and remodel my thinking. It helps tremendously. My husband and family have noticed I am less stressed.
Jamie
For me, success depends on what your situation is and what challenges you are facing. If you are living a fairly stable life you don’t have to worry so much about sticking to a consistent schedule. But sometimes, life doesn’t always work out that way and you have to work harder just to survive. Still, it’s important to find time to have fun and enjoy life no matter what.
Hi Rebecca! I completely agree. It’s important to keep to our schedules and be productive when necessary. But when it really isn’t “necessary” do we have to keep pushing ourselves for no reason? I think knowing the difference is a big part of my growth right now. And then of course, we get to define “success” any way that works for us. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, I read your post a couple of times. I am still a very new blogger. Therefore, it is interesting for me to read the the thoughts and feelings of more seasoned bloggers. It made me smile when you said, “the world did not collapse.”
Initially, I read lots about maintaining schedules. As with all advice, I took what works for me and resonates for me, right now. Re: “The four agreements” Don Miguel Ruiz – your best will change from day to day.
I am finding my creative voice and my pace is defined by internet accessibility, vacations, family obligation, life (as with all of us) and whether a story wants to burst out of me.
I had a rigid schedule in my career, where I had to account for every minute of my day. Of course, this schedule flowed into my personal life. When I stopped working, I made a vow to myself to be more flexible in my personal life. Good intentions, and always a work in progress.
I have also found very kind, supportive role models in the blogging community. I learn from them on a daily basis. The blogosphere is a fun and inspirational place. Of course, I am still in the infant stages.
I also enjoy podcasts. I have put the interview with Seth Godin on my list. I love the Walmart analogy (nothing against Walmart).
Thank you for giving me a lot to think about Kathy.
Hi Erica! I’m a big fan of the Four Agreements too. Things like, don’t think anything personally and always do your best stick with me daily. The one you quote, “your best will change from day to day” is more of a challenge. While I like the concept, practicing isn’t always as easy rights? And good for you for immersing yourself into the blogosphere and especially some of the amazing women and men who write blogs that resonate with you. I completely agree that our relationships can be fun and inspiring in so many ways. And yes to podcasts. I’ve listened to more of Seth Godin this week and enjoy his perspective. Overall I listen most to Abraham-Hicks talks and On Being with Kristen Tippett. What are your favorites? I love finding new people to listen to so I welcome any suggestions. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, Your response prompted me to check on a few notes I made re podcasts. I need to start doing this more. I listen to many and there is overlap, where I forget who said what. My husband and I listened to one on a long road trip (rare occurrence) “The Tim Ferris Show” interview Drew Houston – Founder and CEO Dropbox – very interesting and inspirational. “Dax Shepherd Armchair Expert” interview Wendy Mogel – Very, very good! – a real down to earth doctor with advice on parenting, families, grandparenting – more interesting and better than it sounds. Others: Lewis Howes School of Greatness – many good guests and of course many on Super Soul. I wrote down your recommendations. I love more suggestions! I have sick grandchildren around me this week. Therefore, ‘my best varying from day to day’ – today will be maintain the status quo with lots of chicken soup:) Erica
Wow Erica! I was JUST listening to a Tim Ferris podcast yesterday with the guy who started CD Baby. Very inspiring. And thanks for all the suggestions for more uplifting podcasts to listen to. They only problem with that is that I find some of those ideas so juicy I want to write about every single one!!! (That’s a good problem to have right?) And may your week with your GKs go well. I’m sure with your love and chicken soup they will bounce back easily. ~Kathy
That was a fast response, Kathy! Have a great week:) Erica
Congratulations on taking a week off form blogging, Kathy. I remember from when we last talked, which is not that long ago, that this weekly post was extremely important to you. It makes me happy that you are redefining even this part of your life now, by becoming more flexible and being open to changes in this regard.
On the other hand I totally understand you. I try to blog on Wednesdays. Being on the road in Zesty made this sometimes impossible, so I had to let this “self-imposed schedule” go. It wasn’t easy at first. “I’ll just write a blog the next day,” I thought. Until that was not possible the day after either (because of no internet). And, there was a week this year that I skipped a blog all together. And you’re right, the world didn’t collapse. 🙂
All I’m saying is that certain changes do take a while to get used to or to not feel guilty about. Your own happiness and what feels right is the most important thing. Like you, I don’t care about my stats or the numbers (I actually never look at them), but I want my blog to be fun to create and hope to inspire whoever wants to be inspired.
This doesn’t take away that I have twinges of envy when I hear or see popular blogs, Facebook pages, or Instagram accounts…. 🙂
Success to me is a very personal thing. I stick to my form of success, which is to live a life without regrets and being a good person.
Hi Liesbet! Do you think you’ve always described success the same way? Like I said in the post my definition has evolved through the years and I’m curious about others. And I think you are also a good role model for having to “flow” with your blog because as you say, with all your travels and sometimes being out of connection, you’ve HAD to be flexible with your schedule. My ability to meet deadlines was something I prided myself on especially when I had my own copy-writing business. But now that I have my own blog, I sometimes forget I am my own boss! Silly huh. The good news is I am still learning and a work-in-progress! Who knows where I will be in another 5 years 🙂 ~Kathy
When I was a teacher, I guess my definition of success would have been to be a great teacher, making a difference for my students and encouraging them to have a critical mind. My side goal was to “travel as much as possible” for which I saved all my money. At 28, I became a full-time nomad with an unspoken goal to be free and happy. So, I guess I’ve been pretty much on the same track since I was 21. 🙂
Interesting. It will be interesting to see if that changes as you get a bit older. I’ve found that in the last 10 years my definition has probably changed the most. But I’m not sure that it does with everything. And because I expect to be reading your work far into the future we can find out 🙂
HI Kathy
Here, Here!!! I totally agree. I have several things that clutter my brain. One of them goes something like this. “Oh, I haven’t blogged this week. I’d better get it together and get something written.” But, I’ve decided I want quality, not quantity. I don’t want to write out of guilt. I want to write from a feeling of pleasure. So, sometimes, I don’t post. And that’s okay. Now, if I could get my thought process on the same page…
Health and wellness is a big priority for me. All else falls to the wayside, including writing, for a walk, hike, bike ride, or trip to the gym. Health and wellness also includes eating right, getting enough rest, spiritual growth and spending time with family and friends. Hmmm, having written this maybe health and wellness should be my genre. Gee, thanks
More food for thought from Kathy
Obviously a great post.
Laura
P.S. I liked your shorty post from last week
Hi Laura! hahaha…you nailed it when you said, “Now, if I could get my thought process on the same page…” It is MUCH easier to say than to remember in the moment. Those habits in me kick in (which like I mentioned can be good) but I don’t want to be a slave to them either. And yes to your priorities being health and wellness and everything you mention in connection. Time is our most precious asset isn’t it? So far better to be mindful of our priorities and go from there. Please keep reminding me if I seem to forget. ~Kathy
HI, Kathy – This post strongly resonated with me. I have also freed myself from my self-imposed blogging schedules. Although I do love blogging, one of the reasons that I retired when I did was to spend quality time with those that I love. When I repeatedly heard myself saying “I just need to finish this,” or “I can’t join you now, I gotta get this done”…I needed to step away and find another way to blog.
Hi Donna! Like I said to Janis, both of you have been great role models for me by reminding me that “Yes! I/we do get to make it up!” Of course, like usual, some of these ideas are easier to talk and write about than actually put into practice. But by your example I have seen how it hasn’t diminished my attention to your blog any more since you’ve taken a more relaxed approach–and as far as I can tell now one else has either. Aren’t we fortunate that we can choose our priorities at this stage of life? Now all I have to do it keep remembering it. If I forget, please remind me okay? ~Kathy
I enjoy ALL your articles, and happy to read them whenever you send them out. I always take away a perspective, and am grateful for your thoughts!
Hi Susan! Thank you so much for the support and encouragement. Isn’t it nice to know that at our age (shoot any age) we can choose priorities that make us feel happy AND purposeful when necessary? That’s freedom for sure. May we all be guided more towards that as the days go by. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy! As you know, I have also pulled back on my posting schedule, so I can completely relate to what you are saying here. You write such well-written and well-researched posts and I know they have to take a lot of time. It’s certainly possible to love something (like we both love blogging) yet also be reluctant to devote an overwhelming amount of time to it (especially when we also love other things too, like our partners, friends, having fun, etc.). I look forward to your in-depth posts, your personal story posts, your picture posts, and anything in between. It looks like we will have a lot to talk about when we get together later this year!
Hi Janis. I hope you know that you and Donna are role models for me. I know we have talked about this is person and while it made sense for you both to do it–and it was easy to encourage you–I just didn’t feel the need/desire to do it myself. Until now. As you say, at this stage of our lives it is all about priorities right? And if we are fortunate (like we are) to have a choice, then we should certainly embrace it. Thanks for your encouragement and YES I look forward to meeting IRL this summer! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, I think it is fine to take a week off. I just did it because I don’t usually write and schedule ahead and I was sick and I decided some extra sleep was what I needed and writing my post this week was less important than my health. The world will not stop turning. I have given up listening to the gurus who tell my how many words I should write or that I need to pack my posts full of key words etc. It took all the fun and inspiration out of it. I still manage to find an audience! I will never be the Kardashians of social media, nor do I aspire to be, so I understand your wanting to own your space and your audience and it is what it is!
Hi Michele! I think that when we are sick it is exactly the time to take a break…that and a vacation of course! Our physical and mental health should always be a priority right? And I so agree that “I will never be the Kardashians of social media!” Let’s carve out our own niche and connect with those who appreciate our message! ~Kathy
Oh yeah, the woman with a schedule…me! All those blogging success books back in the day when I started blogging consistently in 2015, empathically suggested blogging regularly and often. Like you, I am happy with my once a week Sunday post (sometimes I throw in a post for Friday), but most of us don’t post and run! We take the time to reply to comments, read other posts and engage with the blogging community. I still remember when I met you at the BAM conference your disdain (Maybe not that harsh, LOL) for bloggers who posted daily. I respect those that have the time and energy to post daily, but I rarely read them every day. As we age, our time is precious and my weekends start tomorrow back at the Delta enjoying the outdoors and our friends. A great reminder, Kathy, that this is a life of our choosing! I look forward to your photoblogs and memes when you get inspired!
Hi Terri! Oh yeah, those bloggers like us that have been around a while have likely read ALL the advice that is offered to bloggers. In the beginning it can be helpful for sure but it’s far better to find our own way don’t you think. And “distain”? Oh dear, that doesn’t sound hyper critical. I actually admire ANYONE who can fit it in and that it brings them joy. But when a person does it and then complains about how busy they are or that they are only doing it to make money I do find myself wondering why. Isn’t it nice that we have arrived at a place in our lives where we can share what we know when we are inspired, and then go and enjoy the outdoors the rest of the time? Let’s keep spreading that around, okay? ~Kathy
Kathy, I’m so delighted that you are making this choice – for YOU! Since I am not a planner but am quite spontaneous and rarely follow a strict schedule for ANYTHING – I think I could learn a bit from your habit-forming techniques. I’ll say that I do look forward to seeing “Smart Living 365” pop into my inbox each week — but often I don’t get around to reading them until a few days later. Post as you will – and I’ll be here to soak up your wisdom!
Hi Janet! I guess I didn’t realize you weren’t a planner too. You always seem to be accomplishing so much, especially now that you are doing the A-Z challenge!!! And I know you have children too…fortunately I think they are older but I KNOW you are still involved in their lives. And like I said, my planning abilities are a two-edged sword….like all of our unique characteristics, I think we each have to learn how to balance them. Do we rule them or do they rule us? Please know that I ALWAYS appreciate your thoughts and comments when you drop by and I do my best to visit you too because I always enjoy your perspective on things. ~Kathy
Don’t post every week! But, oh, don’t abandon me!!!
Though I may be one of your newer followers (can’t remember how long), I have come to look forward to your blog and the variety of posts you share. Retirement is a lonely land for some of us — who knew relocating would mean having such a hard time finding our tribe — and there you are in far away California, blogging thoughts and inspirations I’ve come to rely on these past two years. It seems a full time job and I’ve wondered how you do it. I don’t have that kind of energy these days, hence, never even get a blog going (though intended), much less rewrite that novel, finish the new one, organize the short stories, poetry, essays and ideas into something worth sharing.
I wish there were more fine quality blogs like yours — or that I were aware of them — and that more older women would share their voices and stories of experience.
I wish that you have all the fun you want and enjoy life on your terms and share when you feel like it. While I am not always aligned with your perspective, I love that you share your insights and am grateful for your words, as well as the words of your followers. Thank you.
PS – I just read a short piece in the Utne Reader called “The Garden Center” by J. Malcolm Garcia. I think you might enjoy it also.
Hi Ezme! Ahhh…thank you so much for your words. I deeply appreciate that you’ve found some of my words helpful and inspiring–almost as much as you saying that you aren’t always aligned with them. After all, think how boring it would be if we all thought the same. And no worries…like I said in the post…I get far too much from writing so I don’t have any intention to quit…just pace myself a bit better 🙂 And yes, don’t many of the others who comment offer great perspectives as well. I LOVE that and hope it continues forever. I also appreciate the referral of the article in Utne. I used to subscribe but got away from it for a while…I will definitely look up that article. And please, please, drop in and share others that you come across now and then. Thanks again and have an awesome weekend. ~Kathy
Did any of us really ever believe that it was all about money? There were many in the ’60s and ’70s who went into journalism, the arts, etc — and even if they became lawyers they worked for Legal Aid — b/c they cared about justice, fairness, and a meaningful job that helped other people in some way. However … when we all grew up in the ’80s and ’90s and had to support kids and send them to college, then money did become more important. Now that we’re retired … perhaps we again realize that money is like air — we need enough, but after that, what’s the point?
Hi Tom! I doubt any of us think deep down that it’s about the money. At least I hope not. And that’s certainly never been a “primary” goal in my life. But perhaps because we have been self-employed for 99% of our lives and always had to rely on our entrepreneurial instincts rather than being able to fall back on a profession, we’ve needed to find ways to make it work for us. I think that when any of us are struggling to pay bills or find our way in the world, personal survival might take precedence over altruism. And that might be evidenced in our country in a big way right now. It sounds like you were raised in a family that put a focus on education and philanthropy and that’s awesome. But not everyone in our country has been as fortunate. And while I am VERY happy to now be able to both comfortably pay our bills these days AND share our time and money with others, I realize that I am “privileged” to do so when others aren’t always as able. Plus, I also believe that this perspective isn’t going away. Young people today are being bombarded with images and soundbites of the rich and famous every moment on their phones and unfortunately, as we all know, not that many will reach those goals even if they want to. Hopefully we can share the message that, as you say, “we again realize that money is like air–we need enough, but after that, what’s the point?” ~Kathy
Well said! My journey is similar, and my expectations are continuing to evolve. I think retirement is the perfect opportunity to explore who you are — I’ve been writing about that, too. While some people keep working because they need the money or love their jobs, I believe others are afraid to look inside and experience real change. For me, working was an excuse to postpone introspection.
Hi Donna! Thanks for bringing up that idea that so many of us stay really busy so we don’t have to pause and look at what is working, how we REALLY feel, or what really matters. And like you said, doesn’t it make sense that at this stage of our lives what could be more important. I enjoying hearing from my friends (be they bloggers or not) but the minute it starts feeling like an obligation I think it’s time to remind myself about what matters. Let’s keep reminding each other okay? ~Kathy
I enjoyed your photos and returned this week to read your blog. I too started skipping a week when on vacation because well I was on vacation! I have been working hard these last few months redefining success and it has come down to doing what gives me the love back. Working a few hours per week January through March that I have been doing for the last 4 years, this year just not feeling the love, so done!
Hi Haralee! You are a role model for me. I know you don’t post every week but when you do I enjoy hearing what you are up to when you do so I hope that “gives you the love back” so I can stay in touch. But then of course, I totally understand that at our age we really do need to focus on what brings us joy (and love) because none of us have a guaranteed future. I can imagine that I (or any of us bloggers) would say at the end of our lives, “Darn, I should have published more blog posts!” Hahaha. Let’s keep reminding us to focus on what we love! ~Kathy
Amen to this, Kathy!!! I’ll be happy to continue receiving your blog posts on whatever non-schedule works for you!! And my personal testimonial on this subject is that as a minister of the Center I started 17 years ago – and as a “routine, system, plan, prepare, lather-rinse-repeat” person, I have learned that while that way of handling my (seemingly) millions of obligations has served me well, it has at times taken me to the edge of burnout. So I’ve also discovered the relief and aliveness and even AMUSEMENT in sometimes simply saying , “no,” or “let’s see what happens if I just choose to rest or enjoy rather than compulsively keeping the hamster wheel spinning.” Saved my sanity and health for sure!
Hi Karen! I’ll bet that one reason why we became friends so very long ago is because we are both great planners and take our commitments and personal (and spiritual) growth so seriously! And you’ve taken on so very MUCH in the past that I’m not at all surprised that you face the possibility of burnout. In some ways I think that is a big reason why we gave up our group so many years ago….I just couldn’t figure out a way to manage all that and it was easier to just stop. Thankfully I’m a little older and hopefully wiser and can figure out a way (like you) to make this current phase flow for me. Good for you for sticking it out and making it not only work, but thrive. You have a lot to be proud of for sure. ~Kathy
Kathy, thank you so much for your kind words of affirmation. You have been – and still are – one of my most significant inspirations and role models. xoxoKaren
Ahhhh…thank you again Karen. I love belonging to mutual admiration societies and am blessed to be in one with you. I just wish you and your church weren’t so far away. Thom and I both would definitely love to spend time with you IRL. ?~Kathy
Ditto ditto, my friend! BTW what is IRL??? Sounds delicious! Ha!
IRL = In Real Life 🙂 And yes, it would be/will be delicious!