Looking back I realized I haven’t written about positive aging in nearly a year. Sure I believe it is still possible and highly desirable. However, nothing new presented itself that hadn’t been said before, or was compelling enough to share. Plus if I’m honest, my brain was more interested in just getting through the day/month/year, with all the upheaval in my life and the world, than it was to expand my thinking. Then a couple of months ago I was offered a book from a renowned French philosopher about aging that had me asking myself whether he might offer something new on the subject. Not only did the book have me rethinking some of my preconceived notions about aging and happiness, but it also required that I look up more words in the dictionary than I have in years. While I’m the first to admit I’m usually more attracted to pop-psychology, I’m fairly certain that continuing to stretch our minds and perspectives is one of the healthiest things we can do if we want to age in a positive way.
The book in question is A Brief Eternity—The Philosophy of Longevity by Pascal Bruckner. Bruckner is a best-selling author who has authored a series of books mainly devoted to critiques of society and culture. I had never heard of him before. And make no mistake, this book is much more difficult to read than most I recommend and filled with words I doubt I will never use again. Yet there was always just a tiny bit of something that hooked me enough to keep reading over the course of a couple of weeks. I took it slow—I had too! Just to let some of the ideas play around in my head. Throughout the book Bruckner raises more questions (at least in my mind) than he answered. And while the ending wasn’t totally a surprise, it did lead to a (mostly) satisfying conclusion. Those reasons alone might make it worthy of reading.
If I had to boil down this complex study into a short paragraph I would ask: Now that we typically live longer and have been given an extension to our lives, what do we want to do with it? Calling this extra time an “Indian Summer,” Bruckner claims that all the great questions of the human condition appear in the years after we turn 50 including:
- Is it more important to us to live a long time or more intensely?
- Do we carry on as we have always done or try new things and follow new paths?
- Do we find new love? Leave old ones? Start new careers?
- How do we move beyond great joys and great pains—and keep going?
- How can we avoid the weariness of living, the melancholy of the twilight years?
- What is the strength that keeps us going despite bitterness and excess?
Filled with ideas about the evolution of aging throughout history, Buckner offers insights found in the form of literature, philosophy, the arts as well as his own observations. Peppered throughout the text are lines that illustrate his ideas and offer insights that kept me reading. For example he asks: “What reasons can we give for living fifty, sixty or seventy years? Exactly the same ones we give for living to twenty, thirty or forty. Existence remains delicious to those who cherish it, odious to those who curse.”
In another place he says, “What remains to be done when we think we’ve seen everything, experienced everything? Constantly beginning over…Life goes on: that frightfully simple sentence is perhaps the secret of a happy longevity.” And another statement dear to my heart, “We are always living on a trial basis; existence is above all an experiment.”
I did believe he went a little overboard discussing “eros” in old age (he is French after all). But interspersed within the discussion about why and how we will continue to want and need sex as we age, he plants more ideas like: “Experiencing strong emotions—in the broadest sense of the term—luck, pleasure, good fortune, and enjoying all the kindnesses of the world is not reserved for people under fifty. Even if one has lived a full life, there remains much to do before bringing down the curtain. And in particular this: to rediscover routine as a miracle.”
Do I agree with everything he suggests? Absolutely not. But I did find interest in questioning why I disagreed with him in those parts, and there are still little bits of questions poking around in the corners of my mind. For example he doesn’t seem to be a fan of stoicism and he questions the emphasis of the current dystopic vision surrounding our environmental future—for the damage it is doing to the psyche of our young. He also disagrees with the popular pastime of wanting to “find ourselves” as an indulgence that often blurs the fine line between self-love and vanity. His view is that “A time comes when we have to stop asking ‘Who am I?’ and ask instead ‘What can I do?’ What am I allowed to undertake at this point in my life?”
Areas that I did agree with concerned the obsession of some people doing everything and spending fortunes to extend their lifetime and live forever. He says, “The main argument that can be used against militant supporters of immortality is that, by trying so hard not to die, they forget to live.” He also believes that our consumer culture is being driven by a lack of meaning, and supports the idea that all those purchases are attempts to medicate the lack of happiness and purpose in our lives.
As for eternity? Bruckner states, “Eternity is what we are living in this precise moment. There is no other.” Near the conclusion he declares, “Right to the end, we must remain beings that say yes, that adhere unconditionally to what is: we must celebrate the splendor of the world, its dazzling wonders. Living on this earth is a miracle, even if it is an endangered miracle.” Finally he closes with, “The only word we ought to utter every morning, in recognition of the gift we have been given, is: Thanks.” That sounds like SMART advice to me.
Hello, Kathy. I enjoy your blog so very much and always learn a lot every time I read it. I’m “trying” to be a blogger but find I have a lot to learn. I see where you and your husband live in LaQuinta. My husband and I will be in Indio for about 10 days in March. You’re probably not in the habit of meeting complete strangers, especially in these COVID times, but someday I’d love to meet you for a chat and some advice about blogging. Thank you for your consideration. Kate
P,S, I do already subscribe to receive an email whenever you have a new post.
Hi Kate! Nice to hear from you. And yes it would be great to meet up in person…especially once we both get our vaccines! I sent you an email and look forward to hearing from you. ~Kathy
Kathy – wow! Kudos to you for even reading a book titled “The Philosophy of Longevity”! From your review it sounds like dense reading – not something my brain wants to deal with after long hours on Zoom meetings! All that said, the line that resonates most with me is where you say, “His view is that “A time comes when we have to stop asking ‘Who am I?’ and ask instead ‘What can I do?’ What am I allowed to undertake at this point in my life?” I personally stopped asking “Who am I?” long ago – but I’ve found myself asking, over and over again in the last year or so – “What can I do? What am I allowed to undertake at this point in my life?” Maybe not so much “allowed” but “want”…
Hi Janet! I’ve always loved philosophical ideas and discussions so maybe that is what attracted me to this book? And I did tend to do my reading of it in the morning when my mind was more alert hahaha! And I like your twist on the statement between allowed and want. Definitely a good way to approach it. But perhaps that will change as we age. If anything I am discovering that my perspective on things ‘”evolves” as I age. Even at 65 I am seeing things somewhat different than at 60. It will be an interesting journey to see how my perspective seem at 70 and then 75 and so on. For those of us who like to keep growing, how could it not? Thanks for your thoughts. ~Kathy
So many comments. You sure do like to open Pandora’s Boxes. I found his thoughts reminiscent of Maslows hierarchy of needs. Pick a framework. I was puzzled by his observation that the Greeks and Romans were not innovative…Archimedes, Pythagorus, Plato, Socrates, all the sculpture, architecture and engineering?? Maybe I need to read the book. ?
Hi Ann! I LIKE that–opening Pandora’s Box 🙂 As for a the Greeks and Romans, he tends to call them all “ancients” and quotes them liberally using many of their thoughts as jumping off points to where he wants to lead the conversation. My take on the reason he wasn’t crazy about (at least some of the Stoic teaching) was that it was all about bucking it up and accepting what life deals you no matter what. For example, the Stoics advice to live each day as though it were your last. Bruckner suggests instead, “There is no possible joy without a minimum of optimism about time, without a belief that the coming weeks might improve matters. Thinking every night that the last day has just passed, slipping into one’s bed as if it were a shroud, is untenably pretentious.” See what I mean? I wouldn’t call his views “not innovative” at all. What he also points out a lot is that few of them lived beyond 50 so their perspectives on life in so many ways is different in our “Indian Summer.” And yes, I would love to hear your thoughts if/when you read the book! ~Kathy
Very interesting questions and points, and very timely for me, Kathy. I was borrowing my daughter’s Facebook account last week, so that I could do the videos my yoga teacher posts. And I saw that the ringleader from my high school group of friends is in a long-term care facility right now, with health that has been declining for decades. She survived her most recent crisis with significant brain damage and, while she is not in immediate danger anymore, she is likely in the twilight years of her life already.
At the same time, in my yoga community, I know a lot of people who are much older than me, who are physically active, mentally and spiritually at peace, and very much engaging with life. One thing they all have in common is that they are very dedicated to their self-care and their yoga practice. And this seems to lead to a greater generosity and more acts of kindness toward others, rather than vanity.
Thank you for sharing this! This is a topic that interests me a lot! 🙂
Hi Bethany! Good for you for being interested in this topic while you are still young. I think if more of us paid attention while we are younger than that would help us make so many better choices. While there are never any guarantees, I do believe we have more influence than most of us tend to believe, especially when we are younger. Keep it up and I’m sure you will be aging in a positive way! `Kathy
Hi Kathy, that was mighty interesting and a lot to take in. My post tomorrow is on our aging experiences but we are mostly laughing our way through. I know I won’t read the book seems to intense for me but I will reread this post a couple more times for I love the way your present new ways of thinking about things. I will ponder this one all week!
Hi Amanda! I will definitely check out your post to see how you are continuing to “laugh” your way through. And thanks for letting me know this one got you to think…a BIG goal of mine. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, yes I finally summoned the courage to start the Podcast. Unfortunately I had to take a break when my mother-in-law died suddenly at the end of October. I am now interviewing and preparing for Season 2. Would you be interested in being a guest? Let me know and I can send you details of what is required. It really is just having a conversation.
Hi Sue! Good for you for trying something new. We were doing a vlog for a while and enjoyed the process but haven’t felt inspired to do another for awhile. And sure, I’m open to an interview/chat. I actually find them quite fun and a chance to get to know the host too. Just let me know your details and we can go from there. ~Kathy
WOW, Kathy! Sounds like a very intriguing read. And your readers made some very insightful and compelling comments.
I love the idea that all the great questions come after 50 in our “Indian Summer”. I agree with the concept that the reasons for living later in life are the same as in younger years. I think continuing to learn and experience strong emotions is good for the soul and helps to keep you young at heart. We all need to remember to live and enjoy all that life has to offer. There are so many things to experience.
Life does go on as we all have found out this year living through a pandemic. We cancelled a trip of a lifetime in 2020 however it’s just postponed not cancelled. I try to look at it from a more glass half full than half empty perspective. And I love the closing thought living on this earth is a miracle, even if it is an endangered miracle and we should be grateful for it.
Thanks so much for the review. Enjoy your weekend.
Hi Debbie! Yes isn’t that idea of an “Indian Summer” a good one? It sounds like you are embracing this time of our lives with all the good things to stay happy and growing. And yeah, everyone I know had dashed travel plans for 2020, and there is still uncertainty about it for this year. But with the vaccines happening (we have been fortunate to get our first one) we are very optimistic. May we all be able to do more of what we love as time goes by and at the same time, remember it to be the miracle it is! ~Kathy
I’m glad you tackled the book and shared your impressions with us. As many have said, “growing old is a privilege” and it’s important (I think) to be grateful for that privilege every day. I love his French “take” on routine, and I agree with your interpretation of that word. I think often in out go-go world, we can lose sight of those daily routines/rituals/(hopefully good) habits that ground us and allow us to breathe.
Hi Janis! I’m hoping I was able to do some of this thoughts justice because he didn’t just make a profound statement and leave it at that. Nearly everything had layers up and around each thought so it really did make the reader think!!! And yes, talking of habits was part of that conversation about routine. Definitely a good mental exercise for anyone wanted to make sure their brain is still working. I think for my next reading venture I’ll just tackle a chick-flick novel and give my brain a rest! hahaha…~Kathy
Hi, Kathy – These are very thought-provoking questions. You know that I wanted to start answering them right away, right?! I’m glad that I stopped myself and read through. There are great insights there–purchases as a form of self-medication, focusing on immortality and thus losing focus on living—all so demanding of our attention. I especially liked the closing of your post. That I wholeheartedly agree with! Awesome post!
Hi Donna! Glad you liked it. I did think he was overall surprisingly optimistic because I don’t think I could have struggled through it if I thought he brought a doom and gloom approach to the topic. Best of all I learned a few things that I never even thought of before. For example, he said that in ancient times (Greek/Roman, etc.) that “Innovation was considered inappropriate, and the notion of plagiarism was meaningless, since intellectual property did not exist; on the contrary, one had to draw upon the treasury of tales, stories and fables available to all and not hesitate to reproduce them, to use them to make collages and montages.” I had NEVER considered that before but it makes sense. Everything artistically created was used to using everything they could find to create something out of it…As I know you KNOW, we all stand on the shoulders of those that come before us. ~Kathy
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HI Kathy I found your post very interesting especially the term ‘Indian Summer’ referring to Over 50 and the questions we ponder at this time of life. I also found the gem which was your favourite about living on a trial basis. Much to consider from your reading, however, I do believe that if we are self-aware we can then determine what we would like to do rather than what we should be doing. It was lovely to rediscover you blog and I look forward to reconnecting with you. Enjoy your weekend. x
Hi Sue! Yes, isn’t the metaphor of “Indian Summer” just a perfect way to think of it in a positive way? And I so agree that coming from our own intentions (rather than autopilot) is the way to go. I don’t think he was suggesting that we should do things out of obligation, but he does question some of the preoccupations of western countries (and our mindsets) towards extreme individualism. As with any extremism, any time we become so focused on ourselves and our own needs, we can forget that a degree of purpose and satisfaction can come from being of service to others. Plus, he is French so he comes from a culture more accustomed to considering everyone that the U.S. Lots to think about including how his perspective is naturally different from ours in some regards.
Oh and I saw you are now doing podcasts. Good for you. I’ll have to check them out because I listen to the all the time when doing my morning routine (walking!) ~Kathy
Thanks for chosing some good suggestions about aging, “we must remain beings that say yes, that adhere unconditionally to what is: we must celebrate the splendor of the world, its dazzling wonders…”
Hi Gary! Yes that was one of my favorite quotes too. He actually comes up with some really brilliant (okay what “I” consider brilliant!) lines in the book and because I love quotes so much I was really tempted to list more. Of course the real trick is remembering them on a daily basis! ~Kathy
Sounds like a very interesting, meaty read, Kathy. I’m going to look it up. Thanks for sharing!
Hi Deb! Thanks…and do you know French? I’m thinking it would be interesting to read it in French to see if it offered the same insights. The book I read was definitely a translation so who knows? ~Kathy
No, sadly I do not know French even though it is my country’s second official language.I ordered a digital copy of the book from Kobo this morning!
Hi Deb! GREAT! You will definitely have to let me know what you thought of it when you get done…and hopefully you know a LOT more of those words than I did! ~Kathy
I too would like to hear an exploration of ” to rediscover routine as a miracle.”
I’m just discovering routine and am thinking it might be a miracle.
Hi Jackie! I’m thinking he meant routine more in a way I think of simple, everyday experiences that add to, not detract, from a full and happy life. Like I said to Mary and Nancy, I have things I do everyday that I treasure…other things, are dull and mundane. It REALLY depends which one you are looking at. I’ve never thought of my daily “practices” as miracles but in some ways I guess they are. ~Kathy
Thanks for this Kathy. Re..”miracle of routine” … Mmmm .. like most things I reckon it’s a question of balance. Routines are great – until one gets stuck in them!
Hi Mary! I’m guessing that the word routine might have been adjusted in translation. I guessing, but not positive, that he meant more that routine was the small simple day-to-day pleasures that we might otherwise overlook. Like I commented to Nancy, I journal everyday, I walk every day and for the last 180 days (!!!) I have been taking Spanish lessons online. At the same time I can get quite bored with just doing the same old, same old that represents being “stuck.” And yes, balance just might be the key. ~Kathy
Some interesting ideas. But I do believe it’s a false choice between living a long time, or living more intensely. You can do both. In fact, I’d venture to say that by living more intensely you’re more likely to live a long time!
Hi Tom! Thanks for pointing that out. I think he was mostly referring to those that take their quest for immortality to the extreme. He is in favor of making good choices about staying healthy and happy, but he points out that in many cases some are just fooling ourselves into believing that they can cheat death at some point. He is more about making the most of every day and not putting off doing things we love and appreciate right now. From that perspective I agreed with him. ~Kathy
Happy you read and shared this French author’s message, not something I would have been inclined to tackle. That said “I love the French” actually my Husband and I were traveling in France last year when COVID-19 hit and decided (later changed our minds and flew home on March 13th) to ride it out in towns like Nice, Breaun and Paris. We found the French folks to be full of life and at peace with their state of life. Long live the French!
Hi Rita! Yes he does have a very French way of looking at life and experiences and that was refreshing for sure. In some ways I am very jealous that you have been able to be there during the last year. Hopefully things are getting better now as far as getting out and being able to enjoy your location. We too love France and the French people and look forward to the time we can visit them again! ~Kathy
Thanks for this! I look forward to exploring this book and the ideas of his that you have condensed so succinctly. Those are ideas worth writing about/ exploring/ discussing. I can hardly wait!
Ezme
Hi Ezme! Yes I do recommend it for anyone that wants consider new ways of thinking about some of the important issues of life. (not to mention expand your vocabulary!) I looked it up and he is a young 62 🙂 so it will be interesting to see as he ages further if his ideas change any. ~Kathy
It does sound very French! And wonderfully written (translated???), too. My husband would agree with the “miracle of routine” bit. Me, not so much. What I want to know is a few of those words you had to look up…
Hi Nancy! Certainly French and definitely translated! Although I did listen to an interview of the author in English and he spoke it very well. I think in terms of routine he meant it more as being able to appreciate the simple everyday things as opposed to doing the same old, same old day in and day out without thought. I tend to think of the routines he was talking about as practices. I journal everyday, I walk everyday…I do those because I love them and they help me create a good life. As for some of the words, I’m usually pretty good and “guessing” but his contexts were often different so that threw me too. Here are just three words in the short introduction: ukases, vertiginous, and adulescens. ~Kathy