Since turning 60 a couple of years ago, my interest in aging well and happy has ramped up considerably. For the longest time, I claimed that I was middle-aged and for some ridiculous reason felt that I would stay at that stage of life for decades to come. But something in me switched at 60 and the midlife label no longer felt true. The problem was, calling myself a senior or old person didn’t fit either. Since then I’ve been thinking, talking and writing about the process of aging from all sorts of angles. Surprisingly, something that is becoming more and more clear to me is that most of us hold a lot of bogus ideas about what aging means. And while I’m not usually one to use profanity, the term B.S. applies to a number of those erroneously held beliefs.
With that in mind, here are the top 10 myths that I have learned are simply not true. They are:
- When you get to a certain age it’s all downhill. Wrong! Everything I’m reading, and many people I talk to who have reached advanced age prove that this is NOT TRUE. The majority of people in their 60s, 70s, 80s and even 90s continue to enjoy a high quality of life. Are things different from when they are young? Do we lose some physical abilities? Sure. But being older carries a number of advantages that younger people don’t realize—especially in the mental, emotional and spiritual sides. The best examples are the freedom of caring far less what others are thinking about us, having more courage to be more authentic, and the wisdom to know what really matters. Those are priceless gifts of old age.
- When you get older you’ll automatically feel old. Not true! On the surface, I don’t feel any older than I did 10 or 20 years ago although in some cases I actually feel healthier. When I was young I took my good health for granted. Now I eat better, stay more active, and exercise my brain. I also now refuse to put up with stuff that I don’t like. I will admit that there are some things I can’t do that I could do when I was younger. But now I am far more grateful for the things I can do, and I appreciate my mind and body more than ever before. That’s not old, that’s SMART!
- AARP is only for old people. When Thom, my husband, first turned 50, I remember us both laughing as we threw the AARP solicitation we received in the mail in the trash. We didn’t care if there were discounts, education or benefits—surely none of it applied to us? We were very wrong. When we finally became members in our late 50s we realized that the benefits of having AARP as an advocate to our increased age went far beyond a few discounts. Oh, and their monthly newsletter is filled with helpful ideas and information, too.
- You’ll always think about aging the way you now think (at whatever age you are) about aging. Back in the late 70s when I first introduced Thom to my parents we considered them old. Yet, at the time, both of my parents were only in their early 40s. Unfortunately, we were under the very ageist perspective of thinking anyone in their 40s+ was old. Boy, were we wrong! By the same token, I am now 63 and I am very aware that what I think about getting old is bound to change as well. The truth is that we don’t know what we don’t know. However, I am extremely optimistic about growing older in spite of the fact that I won’t really know how it will feel until I’m there. But, as I’ve written about before, staying hopeful about aging can add up to seven and a half years to a person’s life. Why wouldn’t all of us do everything we can to stay optimistic?
- Forget about good sex when you get older. After 41 years of marriage, I can personally attest to the fact that this myth is B.S. In the right relationship, love-making can and does get better. Enough said.
- The three “D’s”—disease, decline, and dependency—are unavoidable parts of your old age. If you listen to the news there is a good chance that you’ve been told the bogus story of how we are all headed health wise towards a dismal future. No wonder young people don’t want to get old! However, if you take the time like I have, you will find that the vast majority of older people live a very independent and relatively healthy life for all but a very limited time before passing. Yes, we’ll all pass on at some point, but that doesn’t mean that the years preceding that time are only filled with the three D’s.
- You don’t need to save money because you probably won’t live that long anyway. Unfortunately, far too many older people live as though this is true—but it’s not. Studies show that if we live to be 65 we have a good 20+ years remaining in our lives and we would be wise to make sound financial arrangements. Ten years ago, Thom and I did it by choosing to rightsize our lives. We not only scaled back our lifestyle to include those things we really valued and appreciated, but we also worked hard to become debt-free and live far below our income. By rightsizing, we didn’t sacrifice our quality of life but instead ended all the superficial spending that comes from a consumer lifestyle. We now hope to live well, happy and financially secure far into the future.
- You only work if you absolutely need the money when you get older. As I’ve written about before, much of the old model of retirement came from a generation of workers who put in their 40+ years at the same company and then hopefully retired the last few years of their lives. Our current world is much different. I get that some people just put in their time to receive a pension so they could retire. But perhaps a better option is to find an occupation that a person doesn’t need to “retire from” in the first place? In other words, if you love your work and can adjust for your physical needs as you age, why quit? Sure, we all want freedom and time to do the things we love, but why not create that kind of work model from the beginning? My husband Thom and I are what we call semi-retired. We have designed our work with freedom, flexibility, enjoyment, and income, and hope to do it for the remainder of our lives.
- Most old people live in nursing homes. Wrong again. Only 4% of the oldest old Americans live in nursing homes. We’ve all heard horror stories of being forced into a Nursing Home when we get older, but this simply isn’t the case in the lives of most people. According to studies, up to 80% of us stay in our own homes with the other percentage moving into alternative housing arrangements as they age. Every day new choices are being uncovered. One thing is for sure, our aging will not be the aging of our parents.
- Most old people are sad and depressed. False! According to a Gallup Research Survey, Americans over age 55 “thrive at significantly higher rates across five elements of well-being” as opposed to those in younger ages. Those elements are; eating better, smoking less, less worry and stress, a higher standard of living, less worry about money and more freedom. And let’s not forget about not caring as much what other people think of them! In my personal experience I am far happier and content than I was in middle age—and from what I’ve been reading, it just gets better.
Sadly, we are still living in an ageist society that values youth over advancing age. But I believe this is changing—especially if we take the time to refute bogus claims like I’ve listed above. Let’s all stop telling each other that aging is something to dread and start relishing in the fact that our lives can become more rewarding and content as the years add up. As always, it’s SMART to remember that we can choose to age well and happy—and remind each other that the best might be waiting in the days to come.
Note: This post is made possible with support from AARP’s Disrupt Aging. As always, all perspectives are 100% my own.
Okay, your turn! Have you ever believed in a myth about aging that you now know isn’t true? What was it? Please share in the comments below.
I used to believe all those myths and I dreaded getting older. I thought of retirement as being a retirement not just from my job but also from life. Well, I can happily report that I was wrong, wrong, wrong!
But this is from my perspective as a person in her early 60s. For my mom in her mid-eighties, those same ten points are the reality she is living with, not myths. (I note that my mom has serious and progressive health issues. I also know eighty-year-olds who are healthy and vibrant.)
Jude
Hi Jude! Thank you for expressing your personal perspective for all of us. I appreciate how you’ve confirmed that the “view” from our early 60s is pretty darn good. While I certainly don’t believe that I will escape many of the physical health issues that can pile on as we age, I think it is very important for us to remind ourselves that not everyone has troubles–or at least troubles that consume them. Most people are doing fairly well and so much of it comes back to their mental attitudes even when challenged. We cannot control the future but I do believe we can flow with it! ~Kathy
Many truths here! #3 especially bugs me (although I understand why there’s a misperception AND I’m not just saying this b/c I am a fellow #DisruptAging partner!). AARP provides valuable resources and advocacy for caregivers and a number of benefits that have more to do with being human than being “older.”
Hi Paula! Thanks for stopping by! I knew you were also a fellow #DistruptAging partner so I’ll have to go by and check out your post. And glad you like my “list” along with #3. So true huh? Although I’m not sure when I was younger that I would have agreed. Until we convince people that aging is something to look forward to, people will still equate AARP with getting older. Hopefully you, me and the many others who write about positive aging will help with the change. ~Kathy
Hi, Kathy – This is another very insightful and helpful post. I turn 60 this October. While I’ve previously looked forward to each new decade, I’ve been a bit more hesitant about embracing 60. I tell myself that the reason for this is that I’ve really LOVED my 50’s. But deep down, I believe some of the ageist attitudes that you mention have also been at play. Thank you for this very timely and eye-opening post!
Hi Donna! Welcome back! I’ve missed your posts AND your comments while you’ve been taking a break. And Happy Early birthday! Will you be in the desert to celebrate? I hope so–I’ll celebrates with anyone anywhere anytime! And trust me, you will find that turning 60 is actually even more wonderful than 50s….And yes, the stats show that we tend to get happier and satisfied as the numbers add up. I suggest we put that to the test. ~Kathy
Hi, Kathy – I am always uplifted and inspired by your positive words. Yes, I will be in your area on my birthday and would love to celebrate together. I am totally game to putting your theory to the test!
Hi Kathy, yeah!!!!! Thank you. I am a proud 69er now! For my 60th birthday I had a croning ceremony with friends to celebrate entering my wisdom gained and to enter the time of the crone – to share my wisdom. On my 61st birthday I gave myself something I always wanted – a Sweet 16 party! On my 65th I had another party where I danced with my granddaughter – doing a semi split thank you very much. For my 69th I had a “Dirty Birthday!” Since my birthday is in April I asked everyone to please bring dirt or plants for my garden. The party consisted of all kinds of dirty art: finger painting, play dough, sand, coloring, painting, etc. Just started thinking about what to do for my 70th! Any ideas?
Getting older, for me, means letting go of the small “stuff” and having more fun! I still work at my own business as a Life Coach and Hypnotherapist. I don’t have the nicety of a mate or boyfriend, but I feel sexy none the less. And those underarm wings I’m developing – well those are my angel wings so that when it is time for me to ascend – I will fly.
Hi Judith! Welcome to SMART Living and thank you for sharing your perspective on my “myths.” I LOVE your ideas about your parties and celebrating getting older. I’ve never understood why some people don’t like to celebrate their birthday — or have fun doing it. If we lived closer I would definitely ask for an invite. I also love your perspective on your angel wings! 🙂 ~Kathy
I LOVE Judith’s “Dirty Birthday Party” idea to celebrate her 60th birthday.
Judith – For your 70th birthday, why don’t you do something that you have never done before, but always wanted to do. For my husband’s 70th last September, we walked 700 km on the Camino Trail in Spain. We both had a blast, got something off of our bucket list and had a birthday celebration that we will never forget!
I am not sure about walking the Camino Trail, but I do want to do something special. I would actually like to take a Caribbean Cruise or something like that. All birthday’s are special.
@Kathy, Hi there youngster! At age 60 your still in middle age. Unfortunately, I believe most of the myths you’ve outlined will disappear only when we no longer have ageism, age discrimination and the negative vibes currently coming from our younger people. Most new retirees today are still confused when they try or not try to transition from their traditional jobs to second or third acts in their retirement life. I believe that seniors can rejoice and take a victory lap but only if they pursue any suitable activities that make them more active, creative, productive and purposeful. If seniors change their mindset as a group or individually they will get more respect for their skills, knowledge, maturity and resources with less emphasis will be placed on how they look, act and walk on this Earth.
Hi Joe! Thanks for popping in and sharing your thoughts on this. You didn’t exactly say your age 😉 but I’m guessing you have some experience in the matter. And while I agree that these “myths” are definitely very prevalent these days, I’m hoping through my writing, other articles like this and other unfolding research, that we are changing the tide in a happier, healthier and more meaningful future no matter what our age. I do agree that it takes intention and persistence though. I like to remind myself (and anyone else who will listen!) that our future unfolds either by design or by default. Wouldn’t you say that aging well definitely qualifies? Thanks again for your thoughts on this. ~Kathy
Great article, Kathy, and AGREED! Thanks for writing this!
Hi Kim! Thank you. And I appreciate your current blog post about how important it is to let older people do as much as they can. It’s nice to be helpful. But contributing to “you poor thing, let me help” mentality isn’t always helpful, is it? ~Kathy
Great post and not one item I would argue with. John and I had the same reaction when we got our first AARP magazine, but I read it carefully now and know that if someone calls on our landline and says the IRS is on the phone, I know they aren’t. Lots of good info from AARP that can reduce stress and help one stay healthy.
Hi Beth! Thanks for confirming the myth about AARP and their magazine/newsletters. We now know they are usually filled with all sorts of tips and information and like you say, provide common scams that we all need to watch out for! And I also appreciate all the information they provide about traveling well and services that are available to us all. Really good stuff.
But what is the one you would “argue with?” I’m curious??? ~Kathy
No Kathy, I wrote NOT ONE ITEM I WOULD ARGUE WITH. Not one. I agree with them all.
Oh good…just checking. I don’t expect everyone to agree with everything I said so I just wanted to make sure. 🙂
Hi Kathy,
Terrific list. I can’t think of any items to add, but do have an online magazine to recommend. Please check out http://www.agei.st It offers a fascinating series of profiles, and has a great tagline – Live Fast Die Old. I think you’ll enjoy it.
I read somewhere that all fears are a fear of death. I suspect that’s why so many people deny aging – not because they don’t want to get old but because they don’t want to think of themselves as that much closer to death. Until we can come to terms with that I can’t imagine that the list of myths will change that much. However, we as individuals can counteract those myths with our lives and we’re doing that. I find that part tremendously gratifying.
Hi Karen! Yes I’m a follower of Ageist website and I agree that it has lots of great information and stories there.
And I think I would agree that behind all fears is that fear of dying. Thom tends to believe that anytime or anything we fear, are always about loss of some sort so that fits with your thoughts. If we continue to think that aging is bringing us closer to death (a BIG loss) then we will do just about anything we can to either stop it, or go numb about it. I think that is why it is so very important to keep hammering away at myths that are “mostly” not true, or at least ones we have a degree of control/influence over. Beyond that, I think it is essential that we come up with a story or perspective on living and dying that serves us. If we fear the end of our lives either mentally, religiously or physically, then we see it as just getting worse and worse. But as I’ve already confessed more than once, I really do believe that we can make up the narrative of our lives in ways that make the end a normal, natural and life-affirming process. Easy? Not always depending upon a person’s circumstance. But definitely doable…and I am planning to “experiment” with that idea for the remainder of my time here. Ask me again in 25 years! ~Kathy
“You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” We know that as long as we’re on this side of the earth and are OK brain-wise, we are always and can always learn new things. That’s what keeps us vibrant, curious, interested and youthful beings. And now with all the brain research on neuroplasticity, we are capable of making new neural connections, thereby creating new habits and patterns. So give up this myth and get out there and explore and be inquisitive about all there is to learn and live in this one life we’re given!
Hi Harriet! Thank you so much for pointing out that myth of the “old dog.” That phrase is such a part of our western culture that we usually don’t even know when we are using it as an excuse not to live our lives as fully and deeply as we can when we get older. Of course, “argue for your limitations and they’re yours” is always relevant. You are so right that “That’s what keeps us vibrant, curious, interested and youthful beings.” Although I am myself learning to replace that idea of “youthful beings” to “thriving beings.” After all, aging is not something that is optional…but getting old certainly is. Thanks for being a part of this conversation. ~Kathy
Kathy, you captured it for me in #1 : “the freedom of caring far less what others are thinking about us, having more courage to be more authentic, and the wisdom to know what really matters.” That is what I am striving for in my aging. We are headed to a friends 70th birthday gathering tonight and I’m expecting it to be a major party… they mentioned dancing and drinking! Those are the “D’s” we should be talking about … not depression, decline, disease or dependency!
Hi Pat! Yes, I did a crowdsourcing post on FB asking all my FB Friends what was the biggest discovery they made at our age–and the #1 thing was that idea of caring far less what others think. I think “authenticity was #2. And of course, the big one for me is having the wisdom to know what matters to me. I hope you had an awesome time at your friend’s BD party. ~Kathy
This definitely stuck a chord with your readers, Kathy! I taught positive aging as a unit in one of my leisure ed classes and keep telling students and potential leisure practitioners that aging is not what it used to be. If you watch old movies, people in their 40s looked OLD! Now that I am past 40 and knocking on the 60-door, I find it harder more often to really figure out people’s ages these days. Many of our windsurfer friends are still avid sailors in their 60s and 70s with no stopping in sight. When I see them up close, they look YOUNG! Like they are in their 50s. It’s amazing what our passion for leisure and learning our entire lives will do for us. And this generation of Boomers REALLY needs to save that $$ and quit buying new toys (as I say to myself)…I do have a great retirement and still work part-time (with no end in sight–at least til I can draw SS at 67)!
Hi Terri! Don’t we live in exciting times where there is so much PROOF that aging is not what it used to be. And I agree that it is getting more and more difficult to guess people’s age. I’m not sure if that is true for us all, but I sure find that the lines between ages are growing dimmer. I do live in a location where the emphasis on “trying to look as young a possible” is over the top. I am all for doing what leads to personal well-being and happiness but hope that it isn’t just an attempt to deny aging or getting older. (sometimes there is a fine line!) And yes, being money SMART is a good thing especially as we approach retirement. Thanks as always for your input! ~Kathy
I think the media and society in general haven’t caught up with the idea that people in the 50 – 80 age range are far from old and decrepit. I read a news story today about an “elderly” man – he was 77! My mum is 76 and runs rings around me – being referred to as “elderly” is insulting IMHO. I’m not sure when SM and the world around us are going to catch onto the fact that we’re rocking this age and stage – and we aren’t ready to be written off and put into the old folks home!
Hi Leanne! You are so right IMHO! And is funny how the perception of “old” is so different when you are young. I heard the same thing after my sister passed away at the young age of 65–at one time or another her kids tried to console themselves by saying, “Well, she had a long life.” What? 65 long? Not in my book for sure. I think it is so important to realize that there really are differences among people–sure some have it tough–but far more of us have it pretty darn good. I know what crowd I surely want to be a part of, don’t you? ~Kathy
Hi Kathy! We are back from SMA and I can report that aging looks pretty good down there! As you know, there is a big ex-pat community there and I had many opportunities to observe active, vibrant, engaged – and some VERY stylish – older adults. They certainly haven’t bought into the myth of automatic age-related decline, and neither should we.
Hi Janis! Yay! Isn’t SMA awesome? I can’t wait to read your blog post about your trip. And I agree that the city is filled with vibrant and interesting older people who serve as wonderful role models for us all. Like I mentioned in a reply to another comment, I think we all benefit by finding such great role models showing us that aging well is very possible. ~Kathy
Good article Kathy. As an Aussie I’m not sure what AARP stands for ? I find here there is becoming a big gap between those that can live comfortably after retirement and those who only just survive. Whilst we have a reasonable welfare system, if you lose your job in 50-60s the monetary assistance available puts you below the poverty line and if you’re renting it’s a disaster. Single women who have raised children and have only had part time work and little savings can become homeless and we have a housing crisis here as well. So getting older with no job outlook is critical. There is a lot of inequity in the treatment of older people and many are not so optimistic about the future and it’s added challenges, sometimes it’s just about survival.
Hi Yvette! First off: AARP is “American Association of Retired Persons” and has been an organization here in the U.S. since 1958. I should have clarified that in the post so thanks for reminding me to do so.
And I think you also bring up and important and valid issue. It is true here, as I suppose everywhere on the planet, that some people in advanced age are struggling to make ends meet and/or dealing with health issues. Unfortunately, that can happen at any age. My primary hope is to offer encouragement to those young enough to be able to plan differently for their coming years. I know personally that for years Thom and I lived as though there was no tomorrow. We were in debt and didn’t take that great care of our health. Were we lucky? Yes, certainly. But at some point we woke up and realized that we needed to start taking better care of ourselves and manage our finances. We have always been self-employed so we have always had to rely on ourselves for income and/or savings. We made many hard choices.
While I am very sympathetic to those caught in tough circumstances, I believe all of us need to work together to make life more equitable AND at the same time individually do our own part to be as sustainable as we can. It’s not either/or. It’s both/and. Naturally, this article can’t cover all the social issues that exist that lead to problems, but I do believe that staying positive about our choices has a huge influence on our future, so that’s a big purpose of mine. Sure, survival is critical, but I don’t believe most of us are at that point–at least not yet. Thank you for sharing this perspective. ~Kathy
Thank you Kathy for highlighting all the positives of being 60+ and I totally agree with all of your points. I’m 61 next month and certainly don’t feel ‘old’. My philosophy is to focus on living life rather than our number. I agree when we are young even 40 seems old but as my parents died at 63 & 66 I’m determined to make the most of my life. I’m inspired by women of our generation, including you, who are living their lives in a positive way and leading by example. Have a great weekend and thanks again for another inspiring post.
Sue from Sizzling Towards 60 & Beyond
Hi Sue! Thank YOU for also being such a positive role model for women AND doing a really good job of helping to support and promote women our age. It is a bit tricky when your own parents passed away so very young because that can always linger in your mind. Although my parents lasted a bit longer, I’ve found it most helpful to associate and befriend new role models who show me how to age VERY well–happy and relatively healthy–far into advanced old age. I live in a retirement area and if I take the time to look around there are plenty of those role models. Let’s all seek them out and support them as they, in turn, remind us of what’s possible. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, my mother-in-law is 92 and practically running the aged care home where she lives. She has inspired me through her story of immigrating to Australia from Italy with a husband, two little children, a suitcase and no English. I volunteer at the aged care home and I agree there are many inspiring women and men from whom I learn so much. My dear mother, was such a role model for me, taken too soon with breast cancer but what a gentle soul she was. Thank you also for your lovely words of encouragement about me. I do hope I can inspire others to have a positive attitude and enjoy life so when someone confirms that, it makes my day. Have a beautiful weekend. xx
Right on Kathy! I’ve been telling people for years that I still feel 19 on the inside, and I just recently changed my blog’s tagline to that phrase.
But really, should we be telling people about how great getting older is? Or should we keep it our little secret? 😉
Just kidding….but do think of the tailspin the economy would go into if people didn’t buy all the things the marketing machine tells us we need in order to “avoid” aging. Like aging is a bad thing, instead of a natural, continual occurrence that starts at birth….sheesh.
Great post, Kathy.
Deb
Hi Deb! Isn’t it funny about how age just seems so irrelevant as we get older? Of course, I do appreciate a party so I still celebrate. But the number really has nothing to do with it. And actually, I DO think it is sort of a secret about the benefits of aging…but I also think it’s time that all of us (especially those of us who write) need to be sharing the message. I personally believe the best way to overcome ageism is to start making advancing age a benefit that we all seek rather than trying to “outlaw” the behavior. Of course, as you point out, there are LOTS of companies and organizations that want us to buy, buy, buy stuff to “pretend” that we can hold off ever getting older so they won’t be helping with my mission. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and yes, keep enjoying the process. ~Kathy
It’s funny, because I don’t think about or refer to myself as “middle aged,” but I am going to be turning 40 in two months. I think a lot of myths about aging turn into self-fulfilling prophecies. I know people my age who have growing pill boxes, and just accept that as a part of getting older. But I also know people in my Weight Watchers meeting who are in their 60’s and 70’s and going off of their medications, because they no longer need them! There is a lot more that we have control of, regarding quality of life, than a lot of people realize.
It makes me laugh when people talk about how they wish they could be 20 again, because they were so healthy, athletic, limber, etc. I was skinnier when I was 20 (and I am getting back there!), but I am in much better shape than I ever was when I was younger. For the first 38 years of my life, there was never a time when I was capable of running a mile without walking, and now I’ve run three 5k’s!
So far, every “decade” of life has been better than the last, and I suspect that trend will continue.
Hi Bethany! Thank you so much for sharing the perspective of a younger person on this topic. I would LOVE it for lots of those far younger than me to know that you have so much to look forward to as you age (vs. the message I always sort of believed). And as you say, looking back at those younger than you and realizing how much happier (and healthier) you are now is something that will likely be your story as you age. And YES! each decade CAN get better. ~Kathy
My father was a good role model for aging well. He was physically active, happy with lots of friends, and lived at home until he passed away suddenly at 87 without any long, drawn-out illness. He commented once that in his head he was still 24. Attitude matters.
That’s how I hope my senior years will be too. So far, so good ?
Hi Joanne! Thank you so much for sharing the info about your dad. My father was much like yours although he passed at age 80 instead. I strongly believe that the choices we make today will influence (if not completely determine) how we end up. As you say, “attitude matters!” ~Kathy
I am with you Kathy on every point! I do realize that right now I am healthy and want to enjoy my health and activities right now.I may have, I hope, 10-15 healthy years left so I want to take advantage of it!
Hi Haralee! Thank you. I realize that not everyone is as fortunate as me (and you) but I don’t’ want to discount the fact that I’ve had to make some hard choices along the way (and I think you have too–especially regarding health.) But I would far rather believe that we can consciously choose among the factors that lie in our future and hopefully live our lives in the best way possible. As always, thanks for your thoughts! ~Kathy
Kathy – I’ve seen so many variations of folks aging that I’ve never bought into the myths. But as the reality of ‘over the hill’ hits, my various life restarts and spontaneity (i.e. lack of planning) has put me in a crunch in relation to #7. But if I’ve learned one thing through all of the twists and turns it is that I’ll figure it out! My current focus is on reducing the debt and not falling prey to the ‘refinance the mortgage to consolidate debt thus re-starting the debt. I think many fall prey to these types of financial decisions when ‘reality sets in’. Perhaps this could be a topic you might address in the future?
Hi Janet! Good for you for not buying into the myths. But if you’re anything like me (and I think we do have a lot in common!) then you know how easy it can be for us to all slip into some of the ideas that our culture puts out on a regular basis. I personally believe that #7 is a big problem in our culture–far too many of us live as though there is no tomorrow and unfortunately that can and does catch up with some people. Thom and I have worked very hard on the money issue so I know it’s not easy but I think we are proof that it is possible. And yes, I can certainly write more blog posts about that–and the perspective you mention would be a good place to start. ~Kathy
Ouch! Ten points that really hurt! Fortunately, many people I know (online and otherwise) do NOT think this way, but I’m sure some do. All I have to do is look around and see older people who are dejected and seem without hope. Of course, society’s attitudes toward aging contributes to this, but I believe each person is responsible for their own approach to life. I’m not callous about this though, recognizing that a person’s experiences, some of which are beyond their control, do shape their lives to a great extent.
Hi Diane! I’m sorry if my points caused you any pain!!! That was definitely not my intention. Like I mention in the post, I do know that at my age (63) I have only my own perception (don’t we all!) on this topic but I really, really do see it this way. And while I know that I am fortunate in many ways and not everyone does have my advantages, I do believe that a majority of us do. Of course, I agree with you that many of our circumstances are beyond our control…but certainly not all of them. Again, like one of my favorite quotes by Randy Pausch goes, “we cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” Thanks for adding your thoughts. ~Kathy