It’s probably obvious that I spend a lot of time thinking about how all of us can get and stay happier on a regular basis. Fortunately I’m not alone in this quest because there are hundreds of books and lots of other websites devoted to this topic as well. My last post explained why I think leaning towards happiness is so important. Today I thought it would be helpful to provide even more information about growing and sustaining our happiness based upon the science behind how our minds work. Fortunately I’m reading a new book called, Hardwiring Happiness that helps do just that.
Hardwiring Happiness – The New Science of Contentment, Calm and Confidence is a book written by Rick Hanson, Ph.D. author, neuropsychologist, speaker and Founder of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom. Hanson uses his background in neuropsychology to clearly explain that, “Whatever we repeatedly sense and feel and want and think is surely sculpting neural structure.” This clearly repeats what sages have been saying for centuries with, “you are what you think;” “you become what you repeatedly dwell upon;” “it is done unto you as you believe;” etc. Now finally there is science to prove that, “Your attention is like a combination spotlight and vacuum cleaner: It highlights what it lands on and then sucks it into your brain—for better or for worse.”
Make no mistake, Hanson is not the only person who studies and promotes this idea. Jeffery M. Schwartz, M.D. and co-author of The Mind and the Brain: Neuroplasticity and the Power of Mental Force uses his background as a professor of neuropsychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine to back up his claims. Schwartz says, “Cerebral conditions may determine the nature of what’s thrown into one’s minds, but we have the power to choose which aspects of that experience to focus on. The brain may determine the content of our experience, but the mind chooses which aspect of that experience receives attention.” From a practical perspective, Schwartz uses his understanding of “brain science” to help those suffering from OCD. By showing that OCD patients are capable of redirecting their compulsive actions into more normal actions and behaviors, they learn to effectively alter their brains’ neuronal circuitry.
I first became fascinated by the new brain science of Neuroplasiticity after reading, The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge, M.D. In an earlier post about how we can train our brains for a long and healthy life, I was intrigued by our brain’s ability to learn and adapt. Doidge said, “It doesn’t simply learn; it is always learning how to learn.” He goes on to describe it saying that our brain, “…is not an inanimate vessel that we fill; rather it is more like living creature with an appetite, one that can grow and change itself with proper nourishment and exercise.” Additionally, this constant change and growth competes for space and resources inside our brains. If we don’t use it, we lose it.” Our brains will eliminate mental skills we don’t use regularly, then replace them, and expand any other mental habits we focus on instead.
This explains why change is so difficult. If we make a habit of anything, good or bad, it is hardwired into our neural pathways and it becomes a default mode of thinking. Then anytime we want to make a change we must slowly but surely work on our mental skills as consistently as working our flabby muscles at the gym if we’ve done nothing more than be a couch potato in the past. Most of us know that the best way to get into shape is to get moving, exercise and stick with a practice.
Unfortunately, not as many of us realize that the best way to stay mentally sharp is to keep our brains active, passionately involved, and continue to do it no matter how long we live. Of course, as Doidge explains, “That is why ‘unlearning’ is often harder than learning, and why early childhood education is so important—it’s best to get it right early, before the ‘bad habit’ gets a competitive edge.”
In addition to the plasticity of our brains needing constant reinforcement and training we also need to be consciously aware of our brains tendency to go to fear. Evolution has equipped us all with a negativity bias that has kept us alive for hundreds of thousands of years. We impulsively look out for things that can harm us or our loved ones, so much so, that the following statements by Hanson in regards to our negativity bias are true:
- Your brain has a hair-trigger readiness to go negative to help you survive.
- Negative stimuli are perceived more rapidly and easily than positive stimuli.
- …the default setting of the brain is to overestimate threats, and underestimate opportunities, and underestimate resources both for coping with threats and for fulfilling opportunities.”
- Over time, negative experiences make the amygdala even more sensitive to the negative…. Negativity leads to more negativity in a very vicious circle.
Not only does our innate negativity bias amplify and immediately draw our attention to it, it actually decreases the positive. Rather than allow us to experience and dwell in those things that increase the quality of our life (like love, peace and joy), the tendency to constantly be monitoring the negative can fill our life with worries, frustrations, hurts, sorrows and conflicts.
That’s why it is so important, according to Rick Hanson to “level the playing field.” If our minds go to the negative in order to ensure our survival, then we must consciously, for more than an equal amount of time, think and feel the positive in order to counter-act that primal negative tendency.
Only after we have effectively worked the muscle of our neural plasticity into a positive frame of reference, can we consider happiness a habit. Even then, like the muscles in our bodies, we must constantly exercise them to keep them in shape and condition. That’s one big reason I keep writing about it here on this blog. What I’ve learned about brain science and happiness is that tilting toward happiness needs to be more than just a nice thought now and then–actually none of us can hear and think about it too much. Staying positive, looking for the good and generating happiness 365 days a year is a SMART way to live.
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Science behind hapiness, very informative, thanks.
Very cool post Kathy! I definitely agree that the brain is like a muscle. Everything we do can be trained and untrained based on deliberate practice. Recently I was listening to the Freakonomics podcast and they also echoed the same concepts not only related to practice but also to emotions and how to manage negative vs. positive emotions.
Personally I have OCD, so I am usually paranoid about other stuff that are usually out of my control and overthink it. I try to think of positive thoughts all the time, and if that does not work, I usually distract myself by watching comedy shows. I think it is also important to just focus on the things that we can control, and accept the things that we cannot, I think that will make us a lot more happier.
Hi Kathy,
I think I’ve found more helpful imformation when I stop by your blog everyday. Keep your posting week-by-week in 2015. Happy new year to your family.
Hi Bryan! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living 365. I’m glad you found us and enjoy the info. Happy New Year to you and please come back soon! ~Kathy
Thanks Kathy. I love what I see here and will happy to stop by and share more ideas. Happiness Works and I love how it is working for me.
Hi Stephen! Yes, thank you for stopping by and sharing more of your happiness! Keep it up! ~Kathy
Great point Kathy. I have found a small and inexpensive tool that is helping me to build happiness each and every day. I call it my awesomeometer (LOL). It is just a counter that I hang around my neck and every time I feel good I give it a click. Having done this for nearly 2 years, I started out with about 35 clicks a day. Over time I noticed it increasing. My average now is over 300 a day. My current project is finding out how long it will take me to reach 1,000,000 clicks. In fact, I want to start a club of 1,00,000 happy clickers as I believe it will help us in ending unhappiness for good and this has the benefit of shifting the consciousness of not only our selves, but also those around us. If anyone is interested in joining me on this journey, please let me know. Happy days to you and yours.
Hi Stephen! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and sharing your thoughts on this. And it sounds like you have a GREAT way to stay happy yourself with your awesomemeter! What a fun idea. Good luck on continuing your path to happiness and I would love for you to check back with us from time to time and let us know how it is going! ~Kathy
I am going to be picking up these books! Im now studying with Daniel Amen and fascinated with anything brain related! It is exciting hopeful stuff!
Hi Jodi! Yes, I definitely recommend the books, “The Brain That Changes Itself,” and “Hardwiring Happiness.” Both are interesting and easy reads. The other one I mention I haven’t read because reviews say it is much more complicated. Regardless I think you would get a lot out of them. I haven’t read any of Amen’s books but have them on the list for sure. Let me know how your studies go…. ~Kathy
I never used to believe this. I was quite happy being eeyore. I was quite happy being grumpy bear. I think each person has their breaking point. Where you want to change. You realize you can’t seek happiness you have to be happiness. Great post! Plus now I have some more books to add to my pile!
I highly recommend this book “Hardwiring Happiness” and the others I mention too. I think they all not only remind us that we really can influence our happiness, but that our brains are also very susceptible to continuing to grow and develop no matter what our age. I think most of us used to believe that we were stuck with whatever we were born with. We now know that’s not true. I love what you said, ” you can’t seek happiness you have to be happiness.” What a great way to think of it! ~Kathy
This was good stuff, Kathy. I have a relationship with a friend that I’m really struggling with because she is SO negative. When I read this post, I kept thinking about her. I think she is living proof that negativity is a scientific cycle. I’d love to be able to help her climb out of the hole she’s in, but I don’t think she even sees it as a problem. At least now I feel like I understand a little bit of what is happening with her. Thank you.
Hi Tacy! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living. And yes, I’ll bet every single one of us has one of those “friends.” Of course the cycle of negativity is always easier to see in others than ourselves, but clearly there are some people who see no reason nor take any action to ever improve their outlook. Just knowing that it is possible to change if a person really wants to puts the ball back in our court. Do we really want to hang out with and be around someone who is “happy” being unhappy? That choice is usually up to us. ~Kathy
This was fascinating and so important. I’ve shared it with a young scientist I know who will appreciate it personally and professionally. And I pored over it, myself. Thanks!
Hi Carol! I’m glad to hear you find this as fascinating as I do. I’m really not surprised though because you write about similar topics quite a bit on your own blog. Thanks for checking in! ~Kathy
This is absolutely fascinating. I will definitely be adding these to my reading list. Happiness and positive thinking just doesn’t get enough credit in the world.
This is so interesting, Kathy! I had no idea that being negative made us want to be more negative, although of course it makes sense. I have noticed that gossip/plotting/looking for conspiracies/assuming the worst/etc. does have addictive qualities … an excellent reason to cut out that habit cold turkey. I always love knowing the biological basis for the ways we act, and it’s fascinating that what started as a survival mechanism is in today’s world mostly a burden … kind of like our hard-wiring for sugar. Food for thought … haha. 😉
Hi Sarah! Oh yes…what a great way to make a comparison….it is very similar to our hard-wiring for sugar. And just like too much sugar can play all kinds of havoc on the body, so too can fear and worry, etc. play havoc on the mind. And while that primitive behaviors may have been useful in the past….we need to move past them both. Thanks for adding those great thoughts. ~Kathy
So it turns out my miraculous change in brain chemistry wasn’t so woo-woo after all. Other people can experience this, too? It wasn’t just random grace from the Universe. This makes me even happier!
Hi Laura! Hahahaha…I think any changes we make to our brains that increase the quality of our life is sort of miraculous and very, very special. So yes, you can call it woo-woo if you like 🙂 Even better, it wasn’t just a random miracle but one that we can all equally enjoy with the effort! ~Kathy
I’m not sure what I can say to this.
I’m a naturally happy person.
Not over-the-top jumping-for-joy laughing all day long, but I’m happy and content with my life and how things are working out. I have a grumble and a whinge sometimes and now and then things just don’t work out, but I don’t stay down in the dumps and I’ve never suffered from depression.
Hi River! Good for you for being a happy and optimistic person by nature. I do think science proves that it comes more easily to some than others and you are just one of those fortunate ones who has it right from the beginning. But I do believe it is helpful for ALL of us to remember that when something does happen and puts us “down in the dumps” that we don’t have to stay there. Thanks for your thoughts on this. ~Kathy
That is so interesting. I knew there was a reason why I revert back to old habits so easily. It is just in my brain’s hardwiring. This now gives me some food for thought!
Hi Kathy! Glad you found this as interesting as I do. I’m always trying to figure out why I and others do what we do–especially when it comes to happiness. It really helps me to think of my mind as being hardwired as well. Thanks for your comment. ~Kathy
The author’s argument sounds logical, Kathy. When we say it is in our hands to be happy, that sounds a little far-fetched for some people, but that’s the truth. It is possible to work on being happy.
I enjoyed the parts you quoted from the book. Nice book title, too! 🙂
Hi Vidya! I hope I conveyed how much I’m enjoying this book. I’m not even done with it yet but really like his perspective. I’m sure I will write more about it once I finish because it is full of great insights. Thanks for your thoughts. ~Kathy
Those are some really interesting facts on the brain and creating happiness. I always thought I was “defective” because my mind relentlessly tends toward the negative thought first. It’s good to know it’s a natural proclivity and there is a good reason for it. Even better to know that it is something that can be worked on and changed! Thanks for an excellent post.
Hi Cynthia! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and sharing your insights on this. I’m glad I’m not the only one that finds info on the way our brains work fascinating. And I think a lot of us have grown up thinking that we are worry-warts by nature, and the truth is that many of us just learned that early on and it became such a habit we didn’t know the difference. But as you say, the good news is that it is something that can be worked on and changed. Thanks again for coming by. ~Kathy
I say “yes!” to happiness and appreciate the insight that you shared. My life has been blessed in so many ways so maybe one could argue that it’s easy for me to be positive. I just can’t help believing that so much of our outlook can be shaped by our thoughts, though. How we choose to perceive an event (bad or good) can be as important as the event itself.
Hi Janis! Isn’t it funny that those of us who feel especially blessed sometimes want to almost apologize that we have it so good? I know without a doubt that I do have it better than many others, but I’ve definitely had challenges, AND I also know that I work at it too. Somewhere in there is a balance for sure. I think that is why I so try to be a “cheerleader” for happiness–without hopefully being to obnoxious with it as well. Again, balance is important for sure. ~Kathy
I love how you think, Kathy, and how you offer so much on the subject of happiness. I thank you for this post, it’s an important one. As always.
Hi Cathy! I know that you continually do the same on your blog and it is very much appreciated from my side too. We all do what we can right? ~Kathy
Good info here Cathy about the incredible brain. I have read about the negative impacts on the brain so I try to stay away or at least have brief encounters with negative people and not to be sucked into their world.
Hi Haralee! Thanks…I’m glad it reminded you of how important it is. I do feel like I spend a lot of time promoting happiness and wellbeing here on SMART Living but I am the sort of person that believes like I think you do, that there are so many negative impacts (not to mention people) that the more “positive” we can put in there the better! Thanks for your thoughts on this. ~Kathy
I totally agree with the “use it or lose it” when it comes to mental acuity. When I was first out of a job for an extended period of time, I found myself feeling not as sharp as while working. The challenges and requirements on the job kept me thinking and acting and engaged. Without that stimulus my brain just seemed to sit back and take it easy and gradually slow down. Now that I have made the official move to retirement and fill my days with activities from learning French to writing to working out to playing the piano, etc., things are back to normal. And I plan to keep at it to stay on top of the mind game! 🙂
Hi Dave! Yes, this idea of how our brain is so plastic applies to so many areas of our lives, including aging and retirement. And thank you for sharing your own personal story about it. I think we all know people who stopping “stretching” their brains a long time ago on anything new, so it’s time we started remembering that our brain “muscles” need to be kept active as much as any other part of our physical bodies. ~Kathy
I say YES! I am glad that I’m not the only one who focuses on how to be happy. It is so important! As a Health Coach It is also very important for my clients. Thank you for this great post!
Hi Mary! That’s exactly why I like to read your blog AND books too. It’s impossible to read too much (or hear too much about happiness!) right? ~Kathy