Stuff happens. Just this last week a good friend shared that her cancer had returned. Another friend has been unemployed for months and is uncertain about if or when another job will show up. And let’s not even start talking about the people touched by the tragedy in Washington D.C. or the floods in Colorado. And what about the rest of the world? Unfortunately, no matter who we are, at some point stuff happens. The question then remains—what happens next? Fortunately, some people seem to bounce back and stay focused and positive about the future regardless of the situation. While many words describe such a person, recent research suggests that anyone who keeps going with a positive attitude, no matter how uncertain their future might appear, is considered a high-hope individual. So if stuff can and will happen to each of us, learning why hope matters and how we too might be one of the highly hopeful is certainly SMART information.
If you’re anything like me you probably think of hope as something related to wishful or faith-based thinking. In that light, hope may sound nice, but never seems that practical. However, with the advent of studies during the last 50 years in the growing field of Positive Psychology a new approach called “Hope Theory” has been born. Professor C.R. Snyder from the University of Kansas, and author of The Psychology of Hope: You Can Get There From Here, was one of the leaders. Snyder’s theory of hope emphasized goal-directed thinking along with, “the perceived capacity to find routes to desired goals…in conjunction with the motivations to use those routes.” With hope re-defined in such a practical way, a Hope Scale was developed to track and measure the levels of hope in both adults and children. This short test can quickly determine whether a person can be rated as either High-Hope or Low-Hope.
What does it matter? According to over 50 studies done in the last 20 years on hope, both children and adults who score higher in hope:
- Cope better with injuries, disease and physical pain. According to Shane J. Lopez, hope researcher and author of Making Hope Happen, “In one study, hopeful people tolerated pain almost twice as long as people who were less hopeful.”
- Are generally healthier and take better care of themselves;
- Show up for work more and are consider 14% more productive;
- Are more engaged at work (involved and enthusiastic)
- Are more creative at problem solving (better able to churn out big ideas);
- Score higher in satisfaction, self-esteem, optimism, meaning in life and happiness; Lopez claims, “Hope is worth a 10% bump in happiness.”
- Perform better in sports of all kinds;
- Achieve higher high school grade point averages, a higher graduation rate, and college success. Engaged students have an emotional connection with their school. They are more likely to show up for class and are active participants in the learning process. Again according to Lopez, “Hope is worth one letter grade in school with all other things being equal.”
- Are more flexible, adaptable and resilient;
- Experience increased longevity. Hopeful people live longer and live better.
Okay, so clearly research shows that hope is a practical strategy with amazing results. But in order to reap the benefits, a clear understanding of Hope Theory and the practice is necessary. According to both Snyder and Lopez, there are four steps to effective hopeful thinking. They are the belief and understanding that:
- The future will be better than the present.
- I have the power to make it so.
- There are many paths to my goals.
- None of them is free of obstacles.
As you can see, Hope Theory says that a big key to being hopeful is setting effective and realistic goals. To further enable hopeful thinking we need to develop a high quality and positive relationship with the future using a three-step process, which involves a) effective goals; b) pathways; and c) agency.
Goals–Encourage goals that excite:
- -are clear and specific
- -calibrated to age and circumstances.
- – ranked by importance.
- -select several goals using an alternate when profound blockage in one goal.
- -set clear markers for goals (e.g., instead of “getting good grades,” instead use, “to study an hour each day in preparation for my next math exam”).
- -encourage additive/approach to goals (more productive).
- -think in terms of “we” goals in addition to “me” goals.
Pathways–Strategies to develop pathways thinking include:
- -break down large goals into smaller subgoals (a step-by-step sequence).
- – spend time thinking about and rehearsing goals (e.g., what will you need to do to attain your goal?) and identify several routes to a desired goal (e.g., what would you do if you encounter a blockage?).
- -support “keep-going thinking.” If one pathway does not work, try other routes.
- -learn not to attribute a blockage to a perceived lack of talent. Instead, search productively for another route that may work.
- -recognize if new skill is needed and encourage learning.
- -remember that you can always ask for help.
Agency–Strategies to enhance agency thinking include:
- -Keep in mind that goals that are built on internal, personal standards are more energizing than those based on external standards (e.g., imposed by peers, parents, or teachers).
- -set “stretch” goals based on their previous performances.
- -monitor self-talk and encourage talk in a positive voice (e.g., I can do this; I will keep at it).
- -learn to laugh at yourself and avoid seriousness
- -Engage in exciting activities that involve teamwork.
- -get plenty of sleep and lots of exercise.
- -Learn to enjoy the process of getting to your goals.
While the above may seem rather technical, at their core these ideas demonstrate something incredibly important—that hope is something we can all develop. Regardless of what is going on in your life right now, we can all learn strategies that will increase our abilities to be hopeful. Even better, most of these tactics are not that difficult and are extremely effective. Some of the best include:
- The MOST IMPORTANT strategy is to find hopeful people and spend as much time as possible around them. Hope, just like pessimism, is extremely contagious.
- What kind of television are you watching? Obviously television news is horribly pessimistic and unhopeful but so are many documentaries. If you must watch television, escapism TV is actually more healthy.
- Practice Nexting. This term created by Lopez is the practice of getting together with other hopeful people and talking about the NEXT thing that you are looking forward to in your life. Talk about why it’s exciting to you, how you hope to get there, and why you’re the person to do it in spite of any challenges.
- Seek out stories in magazines or books, television programs and information online that consistently shows other people overcoming obstacles and reaching their goals in spite of the odds. Our own individual hope increases when we watch others being hopeful.
- Watch your self-talk and make sure that it is positive and reflects a succeeding attitude.
- Take the time to review your past successes and dwell on them for encouragement.
It’s also important to note that this definition of hope is much different that merely wishing. Wishing is a passive approach where you just set back and think about how nice it would be if things were different. Unfortunately that can lead to the opposite of hope, which is a feeling of hopelessness, powerlessness and despair. The problem with those emotions is, according to Lopez, “Your pessimism and fear have sent you on a downward emotional spiral. When you’re overwhelmed by those negative emotions, your only options are to fight, flee, or freeze. You can’t solve problems well when you are this way. You walk through life with blinders on, unable to see possibilities and opportunities. So hassles turn into insurmountable problems.”
This new way of looking at hope is a practical approach that recognizes that life is uncertain and stuff happens to everyone—but every single one of us has options about where to go from here. Up until now we may have allowed our thinking to stay trapped in a low-hope with little or no possibility for things to change or improve in the future. But Hope Theory transforms all that by reminding us that by learning certain hopeful strategies we are better suited to reaching our goals in spite of any challenges or obstacles any of us could face. In the past I’ve always considered myself more optimistic than hopeful. I’m now aware that while optimism may be a great trait, being hopeful is a process that we can all use to experience a happy, healthy and more rewarding life—in other words, a great way to live SMART 365.
Want To Take The Hope Test? Go to Hope Monger and then scroll to the bottom of the page where it says “Test Your hope…”
Kathy,
Thank you so much for this post. I know I’ve discovered long after it was written but it was very helpful and insightful. I was pleased to see that many of the things you mention are regular practices of mine. So, that was a nice confirmation to receive. What I appreciated most was the identification of hope as an active practice vs. a passive practice.
Also, I’m not familiar with Professor Snyder. But I am aware of similar work from Martin Seligman (Learned Optimism) and Carol Dweck (Mindset). Are you familiar with their work? If so, where do you see it fitting in with Professor Snyder’s work? Even though as a minister, I deal in hope, I’m not completely familiar with the landscape of researchers who are working in this area.
Hi Sherri! Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment…even on one that’s been around a while. 🙂 Yes Snyder is less know and actually was the original guy who came up with “Hope Theory.” Shane Lopez has sort of taken up the ball and is running with it in a really good way that I really appreciate.
Yes, I am familiar with Martin Seligman and Carol Dweck. Both are doing amazing work. I’ve written before on Dwerks work and find it wonderful. Here’s one I wrote: Growth Mindset of Fixed Mindset–Which Do You Live By? I find all of this so very interesting and it sounds like you do too. ~Kathy
Kathy,
In my world, the world of disability and Multiple Sclerosis, hope is everything. Without hope, what is left?
I am going to share this with my FB groups. Great post!
Hi Cathy! Good for you for living hopefully. As you say, can you imagine facing a challenging experience like what you deal with every day without hope?
I do really appreciate how the new focus is on how being hopeful implies that it is a mindset that allows us all to grow and change and overcome circumstances. It is such a good reminder to me especially to stay focused on where I am going rather than feeling stuck and unhappy when things aren’t going well at any given time.
Thank you so much for the share 🙂 and the comment Cathy. It is definitely appreciated! –Kathy
I’m glad science has discovered what I have always known to be true! Hope and a positive attitude matter. My husband, Randy, survived respiratory failure and 12 days on life support by receiving a double lung transplant (I have blogged the whole experience), and I believe he survived for two reasons: the transplant team at UT Southwestern is awesome, but most importantly, there was a collective of people sending positive thoughts, healing energy, prayers, whatever. I never believed he would die. I just didn’t believe it. You could feel the good energy coming in around him! An amazing experience.
Hi Tam! Thank you so much for stopping by SMART Living and joining in this conversation. And what a GREAT story you have about your husband. I will definitely have to check out your site and read about it. I so love hearing great and inspiring stories like that because I think it raises the bar for all of us to hope more, knowing that in itself is a tremendous benefit to our lives. And of course I’m also very happy to hear your husband is doing well now. I’m sure it is because you remain a hopeful person as well.
Thanks again for coming by and leaving a comment. ~Kathy
Kathy, I was feeling discouraged, so thank you for bringing hope back into my day. This advice is so good, I am going to print this out and share it with my senior students who are feeling so hopeless at this time of year because of so many overwhelming demands – extended essays, research projects, personal statements, college application – and the uncertainty about the future. I especially like the line, “there are many paths to my goals.”
Hi Pat….Thank YOU so much for your encouragement. I am glad to hear this article reminded you of stuff you probably already knew but had just forgotten. 🙂 I so agree that it works well with students and encourage you to visit the HOPE Monger website and take the test. There are also a few other articles on that page that are very encouraging for students. I am a mentor for high school girls here in my local community and I used some of the information when talking goal setting–I think it is such a great way to encourage students AND ourselves.
And I personally love the idea of “nexting” and use it with my husband all the time. If either of us starts talking about something negative we heard in the news we remind the other, “So what are you nexting today?”
Thanks again for your comments and your good work with students! ~Kathy
I am a future person by nature so the concept of NEXTING fits right in with my personality. Also, creating a positive environment with friends and limiting exposure to the negative world created by TV news makes perfect sense. Thanks again for an uplifting and information post!
Hi Christine…isn’t that NEXTING idea a good one? It’s definitely a fun way to help me remember the idea. I’m convinced that the more we all talk about staying hopeful and optimistic, the more we are able to stay focused on the future in a positive way. Please, if you have any other ideas about ways to stay hopeful, be sure and share them here with me and my readers…I always hope that you all will chime in with ideas and I plan to ask that more in the future… ~Kathy
Hi Kathy and thanks for a very enlightening post 🙂
I have been a very positive and optimistic person my entire life, and even now, as I near the age of 53, I still very much find myself to be ever hopeful and positive. Although, I find that when you hope for something, or are hopeful, you also need to act upon that sense of hope. Hoping, without the wherewith-all for working at a desired result, is, I believe, a detriment to the consequence of hope.
I hope that made sense 🙂
Take care and all the best.
Lyle
Hi Lyle….You are so right–what I’ve learned about hope is that it isn’t merely “wishful thinking” or dreaming…it is instead a very active approach to making conscious choices and then like you said “working at the desired result.” What did you think about the “nexting” idea….Thom and I have been playing with that all week and it really helps to keep you focused on the future in a positive way. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! ~Kathy
Hey Kathy 🙂
The Nexting concept is a cool idea, and one that I believe already comes with the territory of being an optimistic and positive individual.
In my personal experience, every new idea or goal I have is always discussed with close friends who I am comfortable sharing my thoughts with and vice-versa. It is through these discussions that I find out if my ideas are somewhat unrealistic or do-able 🙂
Take care and all the best.
Lyle
Hi Lyle…oh yes, having a close circle of friends to bounce ideas off of (and get honest feedback) is so-o-o important. Thanks for bringing that up. I like how Brene Brown talks about being vulnerable and open isn’t going on the Oprah show and sharing your hopes and dreams–that’s showcasing and attention seeking. Be wholehearted is connecting with GOOD friends like you said and I agree it is an important part of being hopeful. Thanks again! ~Kathy
I love the idea of nexting. I realize that I like to have something to look forward to. It doesn’t have to be big, it can be a dinner party with friends. I try to stay present in the moment, but I also like to look forward to something meaningful and fun in my life.
Hi Connie! Isn’t nexting a fun idea and a good way to remind ourselves to think about the future in a positive way? Thom and I had dinner with friends last night and when the conversation touched on why it was so valuable to stay positive about what’s going on in the world, I mentioned nexting and we all had fun exploring what that could mean for us. A much better way to spend the evening than talking about the “news” if you know what I mean! And I SO agree that it doesn’t have to be a HUGE project or anything–just a focus on something that brings us pleasure! It’s nice to hear from you again and I very much appreciate the comment! ~Kathy
I’ll attempt to put the situation I am in which is a very long story into a short story.
Basically my girlfriend of nearly 4 years broke up with me 2 weeks ago. She said she has lost feelings for me and that it is killing her pretending to have the feelings she once did. She also said it isn’t fair on me and that she doesn’t want to hurt me etc.
After asking her multiple times over a couple of days if she think we could give our relationship another shot after some space and after we are on the same page as far as feelings go she gave answers like: “Yea.. Maybe” and “Something may not happen, something might x”
So I’ve basically been given a maybe to being able to get back together with her later on.
Even though she really wanted to be friends, I have since gone no contact with her to give her some space to think and to give me some space to let go of my attachment for her and to move on.
My question is, is holding on to hope going to hold me back in moving on? Or will I be able to move on from my feelings for her as well as hold on to hope that we might be able to get back together?
Is holding on to hope in this case wise?
Hi Aaron….thanks for stopping by and posting a question about something that I think effects us all–and that is, when do we stay hopeful, and when do we let go and move on? I won’t pretend that I know how to answer your question for you–only YOU can do that! But I think what I learned from hope theory is that it is an active experience of being very aware of your wants and needs–and realistic enough to know that sometimes things don’t work out exactly as we thought they would–so adjustments must be made.
It seems to me that you have a strong desire to have a good relationship. That is a goal and clearly hopeful. There are steps you can take and even though there are challenges, if you really want one it is something you can experience–but it doesn’t appear your former girlfriend is the one who will be helping make that happen.
Hoping someone else will change is really wishful thinking–not hope. The way I read it, hope theory says that we can only truly be hopeful for ourselves. I think most of us have confused hope with wishful thinking or even day dreaming. While those might be lovely–they can also keep us trapped from moving on.
Of course I don’t know either one of you and I’m only an expert on my own life. Good luck no matter what you decide…. ~Kathy
Kathy, love the idea of Nexting! I have to say that I see myself as a positive person, but hopeful is quite a different thing. The world is changing and not really for the best right now, I would lose all hope if I didn’t feel I was doing something that would contribute to the outcomes I would like to see happen. Being hopeful to me then means doing something about it.
I have goals in life which are more so in my head, but my son from the time he was 9 would list goals on paper with a deadline on his wall. He would then check them off as he accomplished them, add to them as new goals came to him and never saw himself as failing when one of his goals didn’t happen on the timetable he set. He simple looked at all he did accomplish and pushed on adding a new date to reach the one that was missed. I watched this with fascination as he grew and know in my heart it was that practice more than any thing I did as his mother that molded him into the person he is today….happy, fun loving and focused on life.
Hi Lois! I agree that it can be VERY challenging to stay positive with all that’s going on in the world…but I do think it’s important to realize that part of it is because we are so aware of it all now–people post news instantly on the internet and anyone with a phone can even make a video of any event. I don’t think that any of us are mentally, emotionally and maybe even spiritually capable of absorbing all that is going on in the world all the time these days. That’s why it is so important to find our own spiritual center (and I don’t necessarily mean that in a religious way I think you know) and then just rest there as much as we can. I also found this information very fascinating because it repeatedly said how important it was to hang out with positive people. No matter how well meaning, if people are overly dire and pessimistic about the future, that is contagious. I’m convinced that too much seriousness won’t save the planet (or us!) either. I’m doing my best to find and keep VERY positive friends.
And I think you hit on another important thing I learned about these hopeful ideas, they are definitely tied to the actions behind the idea. It sounds like your son knew it intuitively, but what I read over and over suggested that parents either help or hinder this in their children. While he may have thought of the ideas, you apparently encouraged him to continue and that definitely helped him. Wishing happens when we just sit there and day dream. According to hope theory we have to take steps on a regular basis to realize our dreams.
Anyone as busy and productive as I see you being Lois is both positive AND hopeful….it usually just depends on our definition! Thanks for popping in! ~Kathy
This is interesting, I often say when I’m feeling like I’m in a slump ‘I need something to look forward to’ even if it’s just a nice dinner out, or a movie, or something small (not just big things). So it seems I’ve clued into one of the ‘hope’ strategies. I also set goals, and through the blog, have reviewed them monthly and got further than I might have without the regular reviews. Thanks for the great article!
Hi Sarah….I’ll bet that chances are good that MOST of the people who read SMART Living like you are high-hope people to begin with–but as you say knowing that it is a “hope” strategy is helpful to me too. I also found it so interesting that by reminding ourselves even though every goal achievement will have obstacles, the people with high hope not only anticipate the challenges, but they look forward to them….AND most importantly they come up with numerous ways around the challenges if and when they happen. I think low-hope people end up just giving up without using their heart and imagination to come up with different ways to solve the puzzle. Anyway, glad you liked it and as always I appreciate you coming by and sharing ideas. ~Kathy
Awesome post Kathy! Hope is so powerful. The absence of hope…all the more powerful. I just took the test – and I’m thrilled to see that despite a few current setbacks, I remain ever-hopeful for the future!
Hi Nancy…Why am I not surprised you passed the hopeful test in a High-hope way? (I’ve been reading your blog long enough now to know that!) Glad you enjoyed it–and keep up the hope! ~Kathy
When I was young and I was sad about something, my mother would sit with me and gradually bring my thinking around to something in the future that I was excited about. (Like Halloween night or going to the cottage). Now I realize that she was creating ‘hope mechanisms’ to help me to cope with life. She was teaching me how to ‘next’. Great column Kathy!
Hi Kelly…oh you are so correct. According to Snyder and Lopez our parents and home environment can influence our hope tremendously. We are either taught that we can help to make good things happen in our future…or that we’re just victims of whatever comes along. It sounds like your mom set you on a very hopeful course. And isn’t that idea of NEXTING fun? The good news is that even if we weren’t raised to be hopeful, we can teach ourselves those practices and go from here. Thanks as always Kelly for dropping by! ~Kathy