I know that I mainly write about how beneficial Rightsizing can be from a Baby Boomer perspective. I sure hope that doesn’t turn off Millennials, because I honestly believe that the sooner a person starts rightsizing, the better their life will be from then forward, no matter what their age. So with that in mind, I decided to focus on why I think rightsizing works even more advantageously if you begin when you are younger. And hopefully, it might also remind those of us who waited until we were older, that there is no better time to rightsize than right now!
Of course, as usual there are always new readers to this blog and to the idea of rightsizing so I want to begin by reminding everyone that rightsizing is never about sacrifice. It also isn’t about downsizing or giving up anything important to you. Instead, it is a movement towards what you consider to be extremely important to a quality life. That is a key to why it is so important to those of a younger age—why waste any time at all pursuing a life or a lifestyle that you will ultimately find either unrewarding, unsustainable, or just plain unhappy?
So rightsizing to me is always finding and then doing everything necessary to live your best life—exactly in a way that works most beneficial for you and your family. As I’ve said before, it doesn’t really matter how I do it, your parents did it, or even your best friend. What matters is how it feels to you and fits into your circumstances, the choices you are making on a daily basis, and the quality of life you hope to live in the future.
Once you have an overall idea of what rightsizing means, the next step is to consider why Millennials and others of a younger age should be encouraged to rightsize. Here are the five reasons I think it is so important.
#1 The world we live in isn’t the same one as our parents or grandparents. Even if we want it to be, or we pretend it is, or if our heads are buried deeply in the sand—it just isn’t. The things that we as baby boomers took for granted are no longer certain. Everything from reliance on our government (no matter what country you are in), to reliance on the planetary climate, to economic stability, to even a healthy culture and lifestyle, are simply not the same and changing constantly. From day-to-day, the rapid shifts and uncertainty are the new normal.
While I remain an optimist (did you see my post from last week?) I think it is important for young and old, to recognize all the change that is happening. Staying flexible, resilient and creative are very desirable qualities in this day and age. For that reason, pursuing a rightsized life is perhaps one of the sanest things we can do because it prepares us to always focus on things that really matter—and eliminate the rest. When we focus on community, maintaining good health, contentedness and rewarding experiences—instead of chasing success as defined by others or by accumulating a bunch of stuff, we will likely be okay no matter what the future holds.
#2 Real wealth is good health, peace of mind, having people to love and love you back, and living on purpose. When baby boomers were young, many of us were taught that it was more important to look good than actually feel good. Sure having an impressive occupation, living in a pricey neighborhood and having all the latest toys might look like the life of a rich person, but many times they just mask someone who is running on that hamster wheel as fast as they can just to keep the lifestyle afloat. At some point, especially when health is less guaranteed or something uncontrollable happens—we/they often realize the ladder we’re climbing is leaning against the wrong wall. If we can learn at a young age that pursuing a quality life is far more rewarding than an outwardly prestigious life, then we have found a way to rightsize.
#3 Debt is the new slavery. While it might seem promising when you are young to go into debt to achieve some purpose (a distinguished college degree, that intriguing startup business, or an around the world trip), at some point that debt will likely drain away much of your happiness and peace of mind. Sure you might have a lot of stuff (lots of initials after your name, a big house, an expensive car, designer clothes, or even new boobs!) but if you are buying all those things with money you don’t have, then eventually it will catch up with you and suck the very life out of your one precious life. Staying on purpose and living within your means is a crucial element of rightsizing.
#4 At some point we realize that bigger isn’t always better and that more is not always more. During the end of the 20th Century the clear motto was that “bigger is better” in every case. I think that most of us now realize how unsustainable that really is. There is no Planet B. The National Debt in the U.S. at the time of this post is $22.5 TRILLION and over $68,000 per per person! Buying more and more stuff doesn’t lead to happiness. As we get older it is impossible to live as though there is no tomorrow…because if we are lucky enough to have a tomorrow…all excesses comes with consequences. Even when you think you are doing something good, like exercising to the extreme, your body will often revolt. A good life is usually a balanced one, and there are nearly always tradeoffs and compromises. Anyone who rightsizes learns that it is SMART to let go of “more” and embrace “enough.”
#5 No job is worth selling your soul over. Who among us hasn’t seen a movie or two where the lead character sells their soul to the devil for something they say they want? And yet? Doesn’t our culture and very often our parents encourage us to do everything necessary (in other words, ignore our soul) to find a good job that pays well just so we will be “safe?” Unfortunately that often means going into great debt to do it as well. We all know from those books and movies that it doesn’t turn out well, and I’ll bet many of us know real life examples where people have done the same. Don’t do it! Don’t sell your soul for a job to please others, for the money, or for celebrity. Anyone who rightsizes realizes that being true to themselves and living their unique purpose is a priceless commodity.
Bonus! Our happiness and wellbeing is mostly an inside job. A big side benefit of a rightsized life is the awareness that we really do “get to make it up.” That doesn’t mean we can control others or all the events in our lives—and yes, some of us start out with more advantages than others. But what we do with what we have been given is largely up to us. With that awareness we then realize that our choices and where we go from here really is in our hands. That’s a key to a rightsized life.
Clearly there is more to rightsizing than these points, but I do believe that if they had been taught to me when I was younger it would have saved me a lot of grief. The good news is that, many millennials, having witnessed what their parents have gone through and the state of the world, are already living more rightsized lives. The goal of course is not to do better than anyone else at any age, but instead do the very best for each of us given our unique and current circumstances. The SMART perspective is to remember that rightsizing works for everyone no matter what their age.
Kathy, I agree with so many of your points in this article. Chasing after expensive houses, cars, and vacation packages in order to look good while going into debt to have those things is never a good idea. Rewarding yourself by buying expensive toys to alleviate the sense of hopelessness that arises from working a soul-sucking job in order to pay the bills – also not a great life plan. But, the fact is, most people don’t have the option to get well-paying jobs in their area of interest. Many Millennials are stuck in the gig economy working insecure jobs and barely able to make ends meet. How can that be, given that we live in the wealthiest countries in the world? I think it’s not a matter of blaming individuals for making poor choices so much as a problem with the priorities we have bought into in our society. As long as we keep funnelling most of our national wealth into the pockets of multinational corporations and billionaire CEOs who don’t reinvest it in jobs and the economy, and who use their vast economic clout to market their environmentally destructive products back to us, the problem will persist.
Jude
I agree that the earlier we learn the lessons of rightsizing, the better off we’ll be. Fiscal responsibility and envisioning and creating a life that serves us, rather than us serving it is something that should be taught in school. If not in school, then at least parents should be teaching it to their children (and grandchildren).
Hi Kathy et al,
Loved this post and am sending it on to my children who are from 23-40. I like the FI or FIRE as the aim is financial independence. Whatever this looks like to you. We baby boomers (I at least) were convinced to chase an idealized version of the American Dream with the big house, fancy college degrees, and lots of stuff with brand names on them.
Crap.
I wish I had known early on the cost of such things, but none of my influencers shared this. Maybe my mom a bit as she was frugal. But the societal pressure was huge.
I want to go and do and have enough cash to be able to do this, yes, but no be tied down by the stuff that owns us, and not the other way around. So much better to understand this at 31 not 61.
Hi Nancy! Good for you for recognizing the value of living within your means and deciding early on (or as early as possible!) what is important. I hold out hope that people can avoid some of this with the proper guidance. While Thom and I don’t have kids of our own I’m happy to say that some of it has rubbed off on various family members and friends…some at least. And others will just have to learn the hard way like we did, huh? Of course, I’m not sure that what we “said” made the biggest difference. I’m guessing that some of it is just how they have seen us live. If you can pass on wisdom by sharing thoughts…hopefully our actions speak loud and clear. I would LOVE to hear how your children react to the ideas???? ~Kathy
I have posted this on my Facebook with the message for people to please comment there or on your page…hopefully we will see some feedback.
Thank you for the mention Nancy (and for letting me know!) I love how you and your husband have rightsized your lives. And here is the link for anyone who wants to read it. 🙂 ~Kathy https://definingthirdage.com/first-year-retirement/
Thanks Kathy!
I have always been a saver (maybe it’s in my DNA) so, thank goodness, I have never had debt that I couldn’t handle. Fortunately, my husband is the same. I do have too much stuff, though, and am working on moving it out the door. Nothing large, just a bunch of things we don’t need. I prefer a house that isn’t bulging at the seams.
I agree that the earlier we learn the lessons of rightsizing, the better off we’ll be. Fiscal responsibility and envisioning and creating a life that serves us, rather than us serving it is something that should be taught in school. If not in school, then at least parents should be teaching it to their children (and grandchildren).
I hope the conventional wisdom about Millennials not wanting to be saddled with debt and “stuff” holds true as they move through life. I guess we’ll see.
Hi Janis! I know you and your husband are great Rightsizers and I appreciate you sharing how you see it by saying, “Fiscal responsibility and envisioning and creating a life that serves us, rather than us serving it” because that is a short and precise way to explain it. I do tend to be pretty wordy!!! And yes, wouldn’t it be great if some version of that were taught in school? Not likely but still I can see the benefits. Hopefully parents and other people close by are helping to share the message to those that can hear it! ~Kathy
Agree for the most part, except I’m thinking now may be a good time to take on debt, if you have a good reason for it, since interest rates are so low. Getting a mortgage and buying a house is so against-the-grain right now. But sometimes going against the grain is the smart thing to do in the long run. I don’t know about student debt. That seems to be a scam perpetrated by a conspiracy among the universities, the banks and the government. I wouldn’t trust any of them at this point. But you know what? I DO trust the Millennials, at least the ones I know. They sure are smarter than I was at that age!
Hi Tom! Thanks for bringing up some clarification about debt. I agree. If a person buys a home that easily fits into their financial future, then it can be very wise. Thom and I started out modestly and grew our equity so that eventually we had the equity and resources to go free and clear…bit it did start with that first mortgage. But thinking a person has to have a FIRST HOME that rivals others can be a big mistake. So I would advice caution. Plus, every indicator that we are reading in the real estate business is that now is an excellent time to SELL…but a lousy time to BUY. Prices are at a high and they will be coming down. That would be a better time to buy! And hopefully the millennials are as smart as you say they are and are holding off until then. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy, I agree with all of the above comments. The term “FIRE” movement is new to me.
Your post makes me wonder whether “rightsizing” is a personality trait. I would like to think we are all capable of absorbing new information and even incorporating it into our lifestyles. Learning, adapting, adjusting, evolving.
I have always evaluated and reevaluated my goals, living towards “my best life.” Even in my early 20’s.
Your information is very important and relevant. You also remind me how change is inevitable. I extra LOVE #2! I also LOVE your word “balance.”
Everything about this post is , yes, yes, yes!
Yet, a phrase that continues to play over and over in my mind “the teacher will appear when the student is ready.”
Always great information, Kathy!
Hi Erica! Hmmmm….what an interesting thought: “whether “rightsizing” is a personality trait.” There just might be a future post there 😉 And did you see my post about FIRE? I wrote it back a while but think it still applies…like so many things balance is important because anything taken to extreme can become problematic. https://www.smartliving365.com/rightsized-fire-choose/ And thank you for your encouragement…I think we all find the right teachers when the time is right. ~Kathy
I just read “FIRE” Kathy. Interesting on the phrase “retirement is the ultimate solution.” Financial preparation is important. Yet, we also know how we need to learn how to manage many other parts of our life and health in “retirement.” As you say, Kathy, what “you value and brings you joy.” You also bring up really interesting points on whether you enjoy your work versus tolerating a job. Reading your post and some of the comments reminds me how right sizing is very individual. Another great post, Kathy, always:)
Hi Erica! Maybe the word “destination” works better than “solution” in that case? I certainly think a lot of people see retirement as a golden dream in the future where once they arrive everything will be perfect. And while I certainly can’t speak for everyone, I would say that if you are happy before retirement you will likely be happy after….and it’s very likely that if you weren’t that happy of a person before it, there is a good chance you’ll be exactly the same after. I’m a big believer in the statement, “Wherever you go, there you are!” I just have this sense that if people attempted to figure out what brings that value and joy as early as possible, they will enjoy their life at whatever age they find themselves. What do you think? ~Kathy
Hi, Kathy – I agree that the younger the concepts of rightsizing are taught, the better. I also agree with Ally that many Millenials seem to be ahead of the game in terms of avoiding big houses and cars that they cannot afford (and do not want anyway). Knowledge is power. I wish that I had heard the rightsizing message when I was much younger.
Hi Donna! Isn’t that idea that knowledge is power one of the best things we can do for each other and those within our sphere of influence. While I wrote this post for many of my new followers that are younger, I’m hoping all parents also recognize that this would be valuable to pass on to their children. I know those younger don’t always learn what we hope to teach them, but if they are at all aware, surely they can witness whether something was beneficial? I sure learned that lesson from my folks and I’ll bet you did too. ~Kathy
You are spot on about the Boomer response to wealth and health, Kathy, after all, we have lived it. I appreciate this post so much because the concepts mirror what I believe Millennials have begun to learn. Millennials are off on the right foot having seen what their parents have lived through, but debt is a continuing problem as education costs skyrocket! The next generation after Millennials, often referred to as “IGen” or “Homelanders,” are coming of age as many are turning 17-18 years old (born after 9-11), is likely going to follow in the footsteps of the Silent Generation, whose members were born in the 1920s and 30s, and saw the effects the Great Depression and WWII and understood the value of money (they didn’t have). The four generations cycle through history in the same way, so I feel good about both Millennials’ and Homelanders’ futures!
Hi Terri! Where have I been? I don’t think I’ve ever heard the word “homelander” before. I definitely know about the Gen Y group and think it’s a bit young to figure out how different they are from Homelanders…after all, the world they live in today is also WAY-AY-Y different than even the Millennials in many instances. It will be interesting to see how they all mature and what they do with it. Hopefully they learn from our lessons and seek new ways to live and experience life. And while I do think learning to manage our money AND our resources is critical, the fear that they are experiencing on a deep, deep level will likely have some negative repercussions that are hard to guess. Example? The future portrayed in the book/TV show “The Handmaiden’s Tale.” As an optimist I remain hopeful but I don’t think we can just assume it will all work out well if we aren’t paying attention. Thanks for your thoughts on this! ~Kathy
I agree with Ally. Many millenials don’t ever plan on owning cars or houses. Whether that is because it seems out of reach (probably, in a lot of cases) or they are already ahead of the game of figuring out what is important to them – I really don’t know. They seem to value experiences over material goods except – as Ally pointed out – their phones, tablets, and laptops.
There is also a lot of chatter on the web about the FIRE movement (financial independence retire early). Encouraging people to start planning at an early age to be financially independent when older can only be a good thing, right?
Deb
Hi Deb! Oh yeah…I agree that millennials are switching from the consumption of BIG things like cars and houses. As you say, it is probably a combination of knowing that those things are out of reach or so hugely expensive that they won’t even try….or they simply don’t want that lifestyle. I’m a big fan of experiences over things myself so I hope that is the case. But not sure about the FIRE movement…I wrote a post about it awhile back…https://www.smartliving365.com/rightsized-fire-choose/#more-6642 And there are a couple of ways to look at it. If it is about being financially independent…then I’m all for that–the sooner the better. I’m just not convinced that “retirement” is the correct goal for us all to seek? What do you think? ~Kathy
Hi Kathy,
I think it depends on how one defines retirement. For some it means never receiving money from work again; for others it means the freedom to choose work according to one’s desires instead of the need to pay the bills. I think a lot of those websites promoting FIRE are actually making good money doing so, which seems like a bit of a con to me. “Look at me, I retired at 30 and for $149 you can buy my course telling you how I did it!” So, did he or she really retire at 30 or just figure out another, more lucrative career, selling dreams to 1,000s of others?
Deb
From what I’ve seen Millennials have it going on when it comes to making do with less– unless its electronic gadgets, in which case they spend their money like it grows on trees. My prediction is they’ll do great as they age, having grown up knowing what’s what much earlier than many of the Boomers did. Different times, different realities.
Hi Ally! I agree that it is heartening to see so many Millennials switching their values away from more “stuff.” I doubt that even their obsession with all things electronic would outpace the many items that so many of us baby boomers thought were “cool.” Of course, the hope is that they will use those devises rather than be “used by them” which is always possible when it comes to things. But as you say, “different times, different realities.” It will be so interesting to see how it unfolds. ~Kathy