Recently I watched a new documentary entitled Coming Of Age In Aging America. I expected the focus of the film to be similar to much of the other information I read almost daily on the Internet. Sure the movie covers a few of those common themes prevalent in the positive aging message. But more importantly, the major focus is a deep inquiry into the sustainability of how most of us view the overall life-progression or life-course of all Americans as we age. What do they mean by that? And why do I believe it is important for all of us to begin to rethink the current model of aging and retirement that most of us unconsciously hold as sacred?
First, it’s important to define what they mean by “life course.” Most of us recognize we start life as babies, then children, then teenagers, then young adults, then adults, then middle age, and then old. The obvious problem with that particular “life course” is that the first 25 years of life is given all sorts of names and then after middle age, we become just “old” or senior. Instead, the movie breaks it down in a more equitable fashion. They suggest the current life course in most Western Countries is made up of three segments.
- Childhood and Youth with a focus on growth and education. Age 0-25
- Adulthood with a focus on work and family. Age 25-65
- Retirement with a focus on leisure and withdrawal from work and engagement. 65 +
While that might simplify things and seem okay on the surface, the problem is that it no longer fits the 21st Century. Why? That model was essentially developed for the 1950’s view of longevity. Remember, never before in human history have people lived for so long. Studies suggest that if we live to be 65 years old these days, in all likelihood we will live until at least 85. Combine that with the fact that birth rates are dropping at the same time, and the model is turning from a pyramid to a barrel. Also important 
to realize, this isn’t just here in the United States. Europe, Japan, and Asia are experiencing the same phenomenon.
As the movie points out, an aging society isn’t just about old people living longer. And although most of us baby boomers tend to think big transitions like this are all about us as a generation, we are just the “introduction” to this permanent shift. Gen X and Millennials will also have longer lives indicating a permanent shift in the human life course as we know it.
Why does it matter? According to the sociologists that are studying this remarkable shift, this movement requires us all to start thinking about the aging process in dramatically different ways. Changes about how and where we work, how and where we live, and how we organize our families, our healthcare, our economies and our political lives become relevant. In fact, this shift requires us to change how we think—and that’s a big deal.
The film offers the example of how life in the suburbs was promoted during the 1950’s to support growing families. Fuel was cheap, space was plentiful—who cared if you had to drive a long way to work? But now, nearly half of our population still lives in what can be called the burbs. Fuel is expensive and space is becoming an expensive premium for many incomes. Even more problematic, 75% of older Americans still live in these more remote areas in big houses designed for growing families. Driving and accessibility are other issues. Instead of continuing to promote such communities, it is time to rethink future living arrangements that benefit both children and older and less mobile adults. Considering the resources of our planet is equally important.
The film then tackles the concept of how retirement is currently viewed in our culture. Most people today claim it as a right that we all can expect when we get to a certain age. Yet, retirement at age 65 is actually a relatively new idea less than 100 years old. When Social Security was first enacted, the average life expectancy was only 62. So, although longevity has increased dramatically as a society, our attachment to that age for retirement remains etched in stone.
As I mentioned before, according to the movie, the majority of us can now expect to live at least 15 years past the traditional retirement age. But what does that look like? And as psychologist Laura Carstensen says, “There isn’t anything in the psychology literature that suggests that it’s good for people to go on vacation for decades.” Ouch!
Perhaps more importantly, even if we wanted to spend the remaining years of our lives kicking back and doing nothing, how many of us can really do that? Studies show that many older Americans have little or no savings to carry them through an extended lifetime. And let’s not forget the possibility that millions of older adults may be unable to financially support themselves should Social Security and Medicare be eliminated.
The big point of the film is that we are clearly no longer the same people, or live in the same world, as those who existed in 1932 (when Social Security was first enacted) or in 1950 (when the suburbs were promoted) or even in 1970. Yet again, as the film says, “But our institutions, economies, policies, Social Security, Medicare, our communities, work, were all designed for who we were 50 years ago. They don’t work for us today.”
So is it all bad news? Does the movie just suggest that we all forget about ever retiring? Not at all. What it does recommend is opening the conversation and increasing awareness about the issue—not only for older adults but for all generations as well. It’s one thing for a baby boomer and others to talk about the need to eliminate ageism in our society so we can experience greater opportunities. But in order for real change to happen, we need to get all generations talking and thinking about what it means to age well during our entire life course.
One key is to shore up Social Security and Medicare so that those institutions stay healthy for current and future generations. It isn’t a matter of just making sure it is there for seniors now of age—but also that it stays viable and strong for those who hope to also use it in the future—meaning Gen Xers and Millennials too. Suggestions are to slightly raise the retirement age—although that hinders low-income earners the most. The movie points out that raising Social Security rate limits for the wealthy would make the biggest difference, and have the most positive effect for the vast majority of us. But then we have to be willing to insist on that change.
Another of the film’s most interesting suggestions is really quite SMART. Instead of us all spending the mid-period of our lives working hard, raising families and paying bills, the movie suggests that we all begin to readjust our approach to working throughout our lives. After all, the biggest reason most people can’t wait to “retire” is that they have been drudging for years at jobs that they really don’t like. Many see retirement as the ultimate “vacation” they will finally get to experience after all that work and sacrifice. What if we change that? What if we start promoting “experiences” rather than things? What if people stopped going into debt—which forces them to take jobs they don’t like? What if we all started living within (below) our means? What if we encouraged people to take mid-life sabbaticals instead of waiting until after they “retire” to sit back and consider how they want the direction of their life to proceed? What if learning and growing was a life-long event? All these are great questions, which ultimately asks us to rightsize our lives during the entire span of our lives—not just at the end.
Baby boomers are changing the look of aging in our country—no doubt about it. But what if Baby Boomers decided to make it our legacy to reinvent how we experienced life overall—not just at the end? The movie offers some exciting examples of how workplaces and companies can become more people friendly for all ages—and how those change influence satisfaction for all workers. It explains how flexibility, part-time work, and adjustments to less physical requirements being promoted by some employers are keeping people happily involved in work rather than doing everything they can to escape.
In addition, the movie explores housing alternatives in contrast to the old model of the suburbs. By embracing models of communities that are walkable, age accessible, work accessible, financially accessible and connected, it helps all ages, not just older adults. By putting our focus on the quality of life rather than just the quantity, we can begin building a life course that benefits us all. As the movie says, “The best antidote to death is life.” That means a good life overall.
Longevity changes everything when you think about it. This permanent shift means we can no longer just expect a short and sweet life. Many of us are accustomed to living as though life is short—but fortunately for many of us, it really isn’t anymore. And the things we do now regarding our health, our happiness, our time, our finances, and our relationships could very well come back to haunt us in the years to come. Wouldn’t it be better to acknowledge our extended lives with an awareness of how we want to live and experience life in the years to come?
I confess that I haven’t previously considered how positive aging is an awareness that encompasses all generations that follow mine—but I’m now convinced that is what is really needed. The SMART approach is to realize we are living in a time of change on many levels and like so many things, we either live it by default, or we live by design. The choice is ours.
Any discussion of the roll of self talk in you create your own reality?
Hi Bob! Self talk has a HUGE impact on the reality we are living. It might not always seem obvious but the ideas floating around in our head are indicators of where our focus is–and if our self-talk is negative or hurtful or anything focused on what’s going wrong, then we will tend to see it everywhere all the time. Again, that doesn’t mean we ignore what’s going wrong, but we frame it in ways that can lead to improvement. But I’ll bet you know this already right? Let’s all continue to support each other in keeping our focus, and our self-talk on the best we can imagine at any time. ~Kathy
What an interesting post! You point out that much has changed since many of the policies and programs were developed, which is true. But, I think the societal changes we are and will be facing soon, including Artificial Intelligence and its impact on employment, will be equally – if not more – disruptive to our current way of life. I hope those in power will start to address these challenges soon. In the meantime, we need to continue raising our voices of concern.
Hi Janis! I agree that this post (or the movie either) didn’t cover all the changes that will come from AI and other technologies–but we’d do well to know that they are coming. I’m not sure that we can rely on those in power to do that much about it (we can always hope!) so the real change and adaptation must begin with our own thoughts and “designs” about what may come next. That and staying open to uncertainty! Not always easy but important. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this. ~Kathy
Great ideas as usual Kathy. “What if we start promoting “experiences” rather than things?…What if learning and growing was a life-long event?” And of course whether we want or not, we have to contantly change and learn and grow. Lets live life, have fun and grow…
Hi Gary! I happen to know that right now you and your husband are living life, having fun and probably doing some growing in there too. And as a couple who has worked diligently to rightsize, I’m not at all surprised to hear you appreciate experiences rather than things. Keep enjoying your summer and remember to make the most of each and every day. We all have a lot to be grateful for don’t we? ~Kathy
This is just perfect and reflects what my husband and I have learned as we lived. “What if learning and growing was a life-long event? ” is the question we should all be asking ourselves. That opens doors not only in our mind but in our attitude. The idea that “the good old days” were better and we’re not leaving that way of life ever is a path to the end.
We are living very long and in the period we are in, the fourth state, thing continue to change and remain interesting.
Thank you. As always you make us think.
b+
I will be quoting you: The SMART approach is to realize we are living in a time of change on many levels and like so many things, we either live it by default, or we live by design. The choice is ours.
Hey Barbara! Thanks for your thoughts on this. And yes, let’s make our growing, aging and learning a LIFE-LONG event! Also glad you liked that last line of mine. Thom and I try to remind ourselves constantly that the choice to live by design is ALWAYS better than just accepting by default. From what I read on your blog you do a good job of putting that message out as well. Let’s keep it up okay? ~Kathy
Couldn’t agree more, Kathy. A wise man once said, “The age of retirement is over.” That sums it up nicely 🙂
Hi Nils! I haven’t heard that quote before but it fits. Is it yours??? It reminds me of one of my favorites by Confucious: “Choose a work that you love and you won’t have to work another day.” ~Kathy
Thank you for another very thought-provoking post, Kathy. Just like another reader mentioned above, this post provided great fuel for discussion for my husband and me today. We are now both very interested in watching the movie.
Hi Donna! I love that it helped trigger a discussion with you and your husband. Thom and I talk about every single thing I post here and I sometimes gauge how well I think an article will be received based on his feedback. I think it is so important for us to talk about these kinds of ideas with those we love/live with in order to create a future that gives us hope, meaning, and happiness. Thanks for letting me know. ~Kathy
PS: here’s an interesting article further proving my point of view:
http://money.cnn.com/2017/08/02/pf/early-retirement/index.html
Apparently the young millenials of today are shunning retirement altogether, thus NOT planning for it. They are seeking Financial Independence instead (FIRE). They totally reject what most Baby Boomers stood for. many millenials today can earn millions and millions of dollars before they turn 30. They drop out of the rat race, live and explore in an RV or alternative lifestyle and shun the establishment.
I believe the millenials new way of thinking about retirement will become the future.
In the interim, we ‘old people’ are screwed.
IMHO
Kathy, thanks for the link at the bottom of your post to see the movie in its entirety.
My thoughts are, until we can get Hollywood and the media here in America to stop portraying the elderly and older people as buffoons, morons, idiots and a mindless generation, there really is no hope for the older generation. Baby Boomers are the most hated generation by the younger generations. Boomers are blamed for all the current woes of society today. And probably in the continuing future. I really see no hope for any change unless the image of the elderly is improved.
America is still youth obsessed with no end in sight. Americans have very little respect for the elderly. And as long as Hollywood portrays old people, who wear dentures, as the perfect oral sex distributor, there is no hope. Sorry for being so blunt, but its true. The younger generations find older people hilarious.
Retirees or near retirees should stop looking towards the government to solve their woes. That’s what the younger generations now currently believe and probably one of the main reasons why they despise the Baby Boomers so much. There is much talk to slowly eliminate Social Security and Medicare and if the younger generations have their way, that’s what I foresee in the future.
Hi Cindi! Thank you for stopping by SMART Living and sharing your thoughts on this post. Of course, if you read many of my posts you will discover that I am an eternal optimist and most of my writing reflects that–so you won’t getting me to agree that old people are “screwed” any time soon. But I welcome your perspective because I am sure there are lots of others who are thinking what you expressed. And if things are to ever improve then we need to be talking them out and exploring ways we can all work together.
I do agree that America (and much of the world in fact) is youth obsessed so that does make it a problem as we age. But I’m not convinced that the fault lies soley with the media and Hollywood. I clearly remember being young and thinking my parents were old when they were in their 30s. I “was” as guilty as anyone and it has only been in the last 5 years or so that my thinking has shifted dramatically and now I am becoming very senstive to ageism. Fortunately, the agism message is becoming more and more persistent thanks to us bloggers (who are technically “the media” as well) and others who are spreading the word as much as possible. Things are changing for the better in this regard.
As far as the baby boomers being so despised, I’m not sure I agree with that either. From what I read (and isn’t most reading subjective?) we are tolerated because there are so many of us and we do have a large influence on just about everything. I think in our ignorance, we ignored many issues that we could have helped improve (yeah I’m talking about the environment and things like SS or Medicare) but we all got sucked into consumerism and spending and making money so that we ignored the long term ramifications of those issues instead.
And thanks for that link to the article from CNN and yes, I’d heard of FIRE. I actually recommend that everyone, young and old work toward financial freedom and write about it a lot here on SMART Living 365–except I call it rightsizing. Of course, rightsizing isn’t just about financial freedom, it is making all sorts of choices and give you LIFE freedom and high well-being throughout your life. Some people do it earlier and some people later. The key is making the conscious choice to make choices that focus more on quality of life. Sometimes that is retiring early, and sometimes it is finding work that you love and want to do for as long as you like. We are all different so no one size fits all of course, that why I think the word rightsizing is so appropriate. And I really, really hope that more of us, older and young see life different than a rat race that can never be won.
Thank you for thoughtful comments. Together I believe us bloggers can influence others (and yes the way younger generations see older generations) so let’s all do our part to make that happen. ~Kathy
Yet another great post, Kathy! Hubs and I have been talking about this transition for a while, prompting our rightsizing move to a condo last year. After my recent health scare, we’re looking at accelerating some plans, realizing that if not now, when? We want to make the decisions about how to live for as long as we’re able–not have them made for us.
Hi Roxanne! Did you get a chance to watch the movie too? It makes so much sense that if we want or need the money so that we can/should keep working, that we need to do our very best to see if we can adjust the work in a way that fits our changing bodies, minds and hearts. Instead of thinking of retirement as a black and white issue, let’s do our best to modify it so it works for everyone. I think that’s good for business AND good for us as individuals too. But knowing you and your “hubs” I don’t doubt you will figure it all out. So, are you coming out in November for a bloggers meetup??? I’ll keep you in the loop if you let me know. ~Kathy
Kathy, you have raised so many SMART issues in this post that I could write for hours in response to so many of them that interest me. Here’s one:
Anne-Marie Slaughter, Ashton Applewhite, and others are good at bringing up the barriers to working women of childbearing age and also the challenges faced by older, less able people. When you look at those two gigantic groups, you start to realize how much they have in common. That a more humane, inclusive, accessible approach to American lifestyle would benefit EVERYBODY.
For example: a woman of childbearing age is also in the KILL IT + BRING IT HOME stage of career-building, but she can’t do both, so she takes a pay hit. And then when she is older, and wants to work because she’s able, and she needs money due to the Mommy Tax, we discriminate against her based on age. INSANE. But what if people could flex their work all through their lives? What if you spread 30 years of hard-driving career effort over a 50-60 year period? Wouldn’t life be better for everyone?
Oh, I am just getting started. But I’ll give you a break. Great post!
Hi Lynne! Yes it is a very thought-provoking movie and I did my best to showcase what I thought was important (or at least unusual) in the post. But more than anything I think it is keeping the conversation up front and relevant for us all–especially those of us at or approaching retirement–but then all the following generations as well. I tend to think that NOT talking about the big elephants in the room just make us all sort of numb and complacent–and those are the last things I think we should be allowing at any age. So glad you enjoyed the movie and the post because your writing also influences so many people about the positive aspects of aging and we need to keep spreading the news. ~Kathy
Wow, Kathy. Wonderful and thought provoking read. Loved it.
Hi Jen! Glad you liked it and that it got you thinking. That’s all I hope for! ~Kathy
Gosh, Kathy, this is an incredible read and your take on it is spot on!! These concepts are the very things we discuss in two of my college courses I teach when we get to the section on aging. With your permission, I would like to use this article as a must-read for my class.
Hi Terri! Thank you for confirming that this is something that is being studied all over the place. It is very important and I believe the sooner we all start processing it into our lives in practical ways, the better. And yes, please feel free to share it with anyone interested. And watch the movie too if you get a chance. ~Kathy
Really insightful points Kathy on the big picture! One of the issues are homes where you can age out. One level. While it is more economical for builders and people building their homes to build up, stairs can be a huge issue. Close to mass transit on one level, hello!
Hi Haralee! Yes there are so many obvious things that I think many of us know deep down that ought to be changing. The housing issue is a huge one but developers and bankers are still stuck in that profit making mode that says–build the biggest house you can on the tiniest lot so you can sell it for the highest price–and people just follow along. The layout of a house, and the proximity to services (like mass transit) are so much more valuable than square footage over the course of life. Now if we can just remind enough others, right? ~Kathy
Well written post. It got me and my husband talking this morning over coffee as we are the suburb living baby boomers on the cusp of retirement. Thanks
Hi Diana! You spoke music to my ears!!!! One of my strong intentions is to get people to think and talk about the directions of their life. Like I told Michelle, I don’t think there is a “wrong” way to live but some ways are certainly more fulfilling and rewarding. But again, if we are just reactive instead of being proactive, we are at the mercy of circumstances. I guess you can tell which way I choose to live. Thanks for your comment! ~Kathy
This was fascinating. Also, I don’t think I’m doing it right. haha.
Hi Michelle! The good news is that there is no “wrong” way to live and if you’re still breathing you can always do something about it!!! Might I suggest rightisizing? 🙂 ~Kathy
Fascinating post, Kathy! And isn’t it so true that when we fashion a life with meaning, retirement doesn’t seem such a big carrot! I will one day retire from editing, but writing fiction? Never.
I’m also tickled by how as I read this, I kept thinking of your focus. You’re truly on the cutting edge of the new way of being!
Hi Susan! Thanks for distilling my post down in a simple statement by saying, “it so true that when we fashion a life with meaning, retirement doesn’t seem such a big carrot! I will one day retire from editing, but writing fiction? Never.”
Can you imagine what a different world it would be if we all lived (and worked) with that statement in mind? And thank you….I am excited about discovering new ways of looking at traditional issues. And yeah, I hope that’s SMART! 🙂 ~Kathy
Great post with lots of thought-provoking issues. The biggest eye-opener for me (being your typical self-obsessed baby boomer) is that we baby boomers tend to think big transitions like this are all about us, but we are just the “introduction” to a permanent shift. It’s time the politicians — and all of us — start thinking about modern work and retirement, and how to fashion a government and a society that supports and optimizes our new lifestyle.
Hi Tom! I know! I think I’ve taken it for granted that Baby Boomers were the largest generation ever but I think I read that millennials are even larger. How can it not change how we all experience life–from education, work, families and then yes, retirement. While I’m the first to say that I LOVE to travel and take vacations, that just isn’t practical for every single one of us all the time for our entire lives! Best to “design” something that includes the things we love with other aspects of being a member of a larger community, don’t you think? It will be fascinating to see where this all leads. ~Kathy
There are a lot of similarities here with the Australian way of life Kathy – we tend to have a lot of people living in their family homes long after the kids have left, on big blocks in suburbia. We also have people hanging out for the pension and thinking that will be enough to see them through to death. Fortunately we have a great govt backed health care system or people would be in really deep trouble – but I see that falling apart over time too. So many things to think about as we all live longer and still want to have quality in our lives.
Hi Leanne! The movie didn’t reference that the phenomenon is happening in Austrailia but I wouldn’t be surprised if it is. With all of us living longer it is certainly SMART for us to start rethinking how we want to spend all those years–before, during and after kids actually. You are fortunate that your health care is taken care of, and from all I read on your blog, you’ve already rightsized 🙂 So I think you’re well on your way to having that figured out. But like you point out, there are millions all around the world who will be impacted by longevity in ways that they have never considered. Hopefully more and more will wake up and start considering what we can do to live a happier and more meaningful life. Thanks for your thoughts on this! ~Kathy