I’ve never been a big fan of New Year’s Resolutions. I’ve been around long enough to know that most of the time they might seem like a good idea on January 1—but they seldom have the power to make it through all 365 days of the year. But what I do believe is that you and I have a great deal more influence on what happens in any given year than we give ourselves credit for. And much of the time that influence can be consciously directed to create both a fantastic year, and a fantastic life. If you would like to experience the “best” year of your life, I invite you to consider the following ideas that you can use to do just that!
Here they are:
Idea #1 Make “Nexting” An Every Day Experience. I first learned about “Nexting” when I wrote the article about Why Hope Matters a few months ago. Author Shane J. Lopez, author of Making Hope Happen, came up with the word to describe the activity of thinking and talking positively about the future. Using the almost constant obsession that we all have with texting on our cell phones, Lopez suggests that we become obsessed (in a good way) with ideas of a positive future and share them as much as possible with everyone we meet (especially those that care about us). He says that how we “next” can determine whether we are confident, upbeat, nervous, fearful, or joyful, all leading us to practice actions that are connected with hopeful behaviors.
Since discovering the idea of nexting, Thom and I both have begun using it to divert conversation and ideas to a more positive future whenever the opposite makes itself known. With an intention to make Nexting part of my life, I am challenged to stay present and aware of what I am thinking, talking about, or listening to, and make sure it is focused on a hopeful and positive future.
Idea #2: Using The Law Of Attraction. Regardless of what you call it, the Law of Attraction has been with us for a very long time. Ever heard the saying, “what you think about you bring about?” What about, “it is done unto you as you believe?” Or how about, “like attracts like?” The fact is that this “Law” has been a philosophical approach to life taught by some of the greatest sages of all time.
One of the most recent versions comes from a couple named Esther and Jerry Hicks who obtain their material on the subject from channeling spirits. That’s right. Although they don’t call it channeling, that is the most common interpretation of what happens when Esther Hicks connects with what she calls infinite intelligence. She calls this intelligence “Abraham.”
Regardless of whether you believe in channeling disembodied spirits (I’m not sure I do) some of the information is compelling. In fact, not only do many current spiritual guides like Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson and Oprah praise the work, but the hit movie “The Secret” was based upon some of the teachings as well. I personally believe the best way to judge anything is to consider if it contains information helpful to us—and at that point the demonstration is all the authority we need. On the flip side, if you want to disbelieve the information, no amount of proof will change your mind.
I first heard about Abraham and his/their version of the Law of Attraction about 20 years ago. After reading and listening to several lectures I usually walked away with an idea or two that was helpful but the whole “channeling thing” sort of turned me off. Then a couple of weeks ago I read something that led me to purchase their latest book called The Vortex and start reading. And although I’ve barely covered about 25% of the book, I already know that if I commit to put into practice the ideas that I’m reading, my 2014 will be the best year ever.
The major idea that I plan to use to make it a great year is the idea that everything is vibration. You, me, and the world around us are at our core, vibrating energy. What we give out comes back to us—every single time. If we want anything to change, we have to put out a different vibration, and like a boomerang, that vibration will return to us. There is obviously much, much more to this entire way of thinking, but if any of us can remember 24/7 that we are all vibration—sending out and getting back all that we experience—we can “deliberately” co-create an amazing year.
Idea #3 Be Sure And Outline Your W.A.I. Last January I wrote about a process that I use each year to set my intentions. W.A.I. stands for 1) Welcome; 2) Accept; & 3) Intend. And while I don’t need to rewrite the process, (you can read about it here) I do believe that these three elements are important aspects to creating an exciting and fulfilling year.
Idea #4 Embrace The Idea That No One Else Can Make You Happy Or Unhappy. Philosophers and teachers throughout the ages have taught this concept as a way to greater happiness and wellbeing. It is also another strong idea promoted by Abraham/Hicks and their version of the Law of Attraction. The reason that I am currently finding it so persuasive is because Abraham/Hicks teaches that when we are operating in true harmony (there’s that idea of vibration again) then we are intimately connected to our Source. In fact, the most authentic happiness of all comes from that deep connection. While we might believe that others can either make us happy or sad, the truth, at least according to Abraham/Hicks is that only we can connect to or sever our relationship with Source—no one else. Actually, Abraham/Hicks teaches that every experience we have with others is an experience we evoke in them—nothing more or less. That makes us solely responsible for our own happiness and wellbeing. Constantly reminding myself that others cannot control my connection to Source or happiness is a way to make an amazing year.
Tool #5 Prime The Pump & Act As If. Another article I wrote a while back had to do with the unmistakable power of “acting as if.” This is another one of those sayings that has been around for millennium—mainly because there is truth behind it. Several years ago author Wayne Dyer came out with a book called, You’ll See It When You Believe It as another way to remind us that unless we first believe something is possible, we won’t even attempt it. What I discovered in my earlier article was that our brains are actually set up to look for and engage in anything related to what we are thinking or feeling. So if we want to experience something we must first “prime the pump” and set our mind and consciousness in that direction. In other words, if we want an extraordinary year, we’d better start acting as if.
I don’t know about you but I am determined to make this coming year my best year ever. And while I don’t delude myself into thinking that you or I won’t be challenged by extenuating circumstances, I am convinced that even when I can’t change those circumstances, I can always change how I view and respond to them. Besides, who among us wouldn’t like to be the one on December 31st who turns to loved ones and joyfully asks, “Wasn’t this just the best year ever?”
So what about YOU? What do you think of these ideas? I’d love to hear in the comments below what you think about them. Are they doable? Worth trying? Do you have better ideas? Please comment and share. Thanks!
Hy Kathy,
An epic post, truely wonderful. I am also a great believer of THE SECRET and the the other two books followed by The Power and The magic. I believe that your thoughts are the strongest source to bring about any thing you want in your life, may it be a person or a materialistic thing. The point where people usually do not get the results are those who are weak at believing stage, because asking is not a big task but to memorize the one which is asked is where you are supposed to be tested.
I would really like to know more about your experiences with THE SECRET or LOA.
Thanks a ton.
Hi Charmie! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and adding your thoughts. Yes the LOA has some wonderful insights into for those of us who are open to the message. I’m not a big fan of the movie because I thought it emphasized getting material stuff far too much….but I know that we all have to start somewhere. I’m not against material stuff but I don’t think that actually makes us all that happy or satisfied over the long haul. Meanwhile when you learn to know your “true essence” or Source as Abraham Hicks talks about, then you are empowered to live the life of your dreams. And I found that very helpful for us all.
So far this year I have been mainly listening to tapes and segments of talks by Abramham-Hicks. I listen most days and also have been using the meditation tapes. Very helpful. At some point I will definitely write more about my experience but I am living each day flooded with happiness and wellbeing and that’s the point right? Thanks again for stopping by and please come back when you’re able. ~Kathy
Wow….it is amazing how like minded people find each other! Something told me I was going to love this blog site and I was right! I’m grateful I found it! Thank you!
Hi Debbie! Thanks for coming by SMART Living and leaving a comment. I’m glad you find the site valuable. Please feel free to comment as much as possible. ~Kathy
“Nexting”
I like that.
I picked a word this year for 2014: transformative.
I love how it rolls off the tongue.
LOVE the post!! Xx
Hi Kim! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and leaving a message! Yes, NEXTing is such a fun way to bring me back to thinking about what comes NEXT. Glad you liked it. I also like TRANSFORMATIVE–that word implies all sorts of possibility and expectation. I’m sure it will help you to have your BEST year ever. Thanks again for your comment. ~Kathy
I really like your idea of “nexting”. When I’m at work I’m often surrounded by lots of negative chatter, it’s a good reminder to try and add something positive to the conversations- rather than remaining quiet or piling on. Of course that’s easier said than done (for me anyway)!
Hi Mona! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and joining the conversation. Yes, NEXTing is one of the best things I’ve added to my life this year….and as you say, it is an excellent way to counteract negative chatter. It’s also a great way to switch the focus when someone you care about (like my husband Thom) starts heading down the sometimes slippery-slope of politics. Instead of jumping in like I’ve done in the past I just say something like, “so how is that new exciting project of your’s coming along?” and before you know it we are talking about GOOD instead of something else! Thanks again for your comment. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy,
It’s wonderful to be over at your blog too 🙂
I loved the ideas shared, so much of the way I think too. I liked the word
‘Nexting and it’s certainly a great word to start using in our day to
day conversations too. If texting can be used, why not nexting, which is far
better where the meaning is concerned.
I too am a strong believer of the LOA, and I think what you think, is what you become, so always remain positive and leave no room for negativity, isn’t it? I wish more people could understand that happiness lies in their hands, and not in anyone else’s. They become so dependent on another person, and well, honestly speaking, sometimes it’s the case with me too, till I remind myself that I can be happy myself, and I can – it’s all in the mind I’d say.
Thanks for sharing these wonderful ideas to make this your best year ever. Wishing you a very Happy New Year as well 🙂
Hi Harleena! Thank you so much for stopping by SMART Living and joining the conversation! I know you had an extra challenge getting past my spam blocker so I REALLY appreciate your efforts. And don’t you just love the idea of NEXTing? If you are a LOA person then you know the value of looking to the positive future…but if you’re anything like me you can use lots of reminders. One of the best things I’m finding is that with so many of us on the same page we can clump together and remind each other on a regular basis. Besides it is so much more fun to do it with like-minded friends. Your “Life Plan” on your latest blog post is a GREAT one and I think as long as we stay true to what we already know that this year is going to be FABULOUS! Thanks again for stopping by! ~Kathy
You’re very welcome! 🙂
Hi Kathy. I had a few “resolutions” for 2014:
Vow to not go bat crap crazy every time my husband leaves a dirty dish in the kitchen sink. Not every time…
May on occasion leave the bed unmade, preferably at least once a week, perhaps on Sundays. Could start a new messy Sunday revolution.
Affirm to be a kinder, gentler Kimba, even to the crazies who drive in Northern Virginia.
Hi Kimba! It sounds like you’ve got some great resolutions to work on this year. Be sure and “NEXT” them and prime them as the days go by and I’ll bet you’ll have tremendous success! Of course that one about being kind to the crazies who drive ANYWHERE is always challenging. Be sure and stop back by now and then and let us know your progress! ~Kathy
I think, or hope, that by the time we get to be a certain age–and it differs for each of us we learn how to challenge ourselves so that we live and work optimally.
That said, I have a disorganization problem, caused by a minor neurological disorder that wasn’t diagnosed until I was 56. It makes writing a book much harder and I won’t even go into the state of my closet.
But I refuse to turn into a negative person and that helps incredibly.
Hi Pia! You so right! As we age we hopefully learn a lot along the way about what works for each of us in creating a happy and optimal life. And even when you have challenges like you mention, there are ways we can still carry on and create a happy life that works for us. Good for you for refusing to live a negative life. Ultimately it all starts right there with that choice and goes from there. Thanks for your comment! ~Kathy
These are all such great ideas. Priming the Pump and using the Law of Attraction have both worked for me. It always surprises me when people wallow in the negative and then get stuck there. All your suggestions really WILL help people have a better year. Including ME!
Hi Carol! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and sharing ideas! After having read your blog for a while now I’m not at all surprised that those two ideas are part of your practices already. They just make so much sense even if you only use them some of the time or part of the way. And as you also know, one of the best parts about blogging is sharing ideas with each other and then being reminded of them while we type. Thanks again for your comments! ~Kathy
My niece did a reading for me a few weeks ago. I was a brand new experience. She talked about listening and then told me what she was supposed to say. It was a little disconcerting, but the advice was spot on. Mostly, it was things I already knew but didn’t really recognize, if that makes sense. Your tools tie into all of that. I’m working to improve my mindset in all of these ways, especially Priming the Pump and being responsible for my own happiness. This is going to be an amazing year. I can’t wait to see what it brings for both of us!!
Hi Jennifer! Thank you so much for stopping by SMART Living and joining the conversation. I so get what you mean about hearing something and have it something seem very familiar–and yet new at the same time. For one, I don’t think any of us really “hears” anything fully and deeply until we are absolutely ready to hear it. AND I know that as I change, even things I’ve heard before change too so it sometimes sounds as if I’m hearing it for the very first time. I’m not sure exactly if that’s what you mean but I know I’ve experienced it that way too!
And I’m glad you liked the priming the pump idea. Honestly this has been, and continues to be so helpful to me in my life so I’m happy it is helping others too. YES! Please come back often and let us know how great your life is going this year! ~Kathy
These are great reminders. Yes to the nexting, too! I like moving forward rather than staying stuck.
Hi Sheryl…Happy New Year! I’m glad you liked my reminders AND the nexting. It’s a fun way to think about the future in a positive way. And I just see from your comment LUV that you’ve been Mexico…I will DEFINITELY need to check that out because we are taking a trip this fall to MEX City and Oaxaca. Thanks again for your comment. ~Kathy
So much great information here – thank you for gathering it all together and providing such wonderful inspiration for the new year!
P.S. – You’re a winner! http://www.alphabetsalad.com/superstar-blogger-award/
Hi Laurel! Thank you so much for stopping by and Wow! Thanks for the award. http://www.alphabetsalad.com/superstar-blogger-award/
I think I’m a bit like you. (okay maybe a lot!) I always always appreciate when another blogger (especially one that I follow and really admire) points out my work and nominates me for a blogging award. But I’ve also found that some of the requirements for acceptance can take on a life of their own. So I stopped posting them on my blog a while back just so I didn’t have to experience the guilt of not getting around to doing everything required! But please know that I am very honored and appreciative…and here’s my answers:
#1 My bluntness? At least I’m hoping that most people consider my outspoken nature funny. Maybe I should ask my husband????
#2 John Stewart of the Daily Show. He is the only news I watch…of course maybe that is my what makes me funny?
#3 Me….I am incredibly lucky and win things all the time…of course I also consider that blessed.
#4 I too am a fair-weather person. Not too hot and not too cold!
#5 Adventurer!
Thanks again for this lovely recognition! ~Kathy
Miraculously I was able to avoid maiming him for several transgressions during my cleanse week. I quite impressed myself with the restraint I showed! 🙂
I also appreciate your approach to New Year’s Resolutions! My favorite point would have to be the fifth, because as my husband and I start a new business, I find myself acting as if it’s already thriving just to keep myself motivated. Thank you for sharing 🙂
Hi Aly! Thanks for stopping by SMART Living and a very HAPPY NEW Year to you! And congratulations on starting a new business together. And if you take the time to set your intentions and “prime the pump” you will do much to help your business thrive and be successful. And how exciting to write a blog about it. I’m going to have to pop over and check out your blog next 🙂 Please come back often and let us know of your ongoing success! ~Kathy
Kathy I so prefer your approach to the many ‘how to set better resolutions’ type posts that abound this time of year. I particularly like the reminder that no one can make you happy or unhappy. When I’m in the zone where I truly ‘get’ this (Like everyone else, I forget at times) I feel so much more empowered and optimistic. When I’m in a ‘it’s all their fault’ mindset I get into the helpless space of blame and hopelessness.
Awesome list Kathy and Happy 2014!
Hi Jo! Thanks for stopping by and joining the conversation. I’m not surprised with all the work you do around resilience that you would gravitate to ideas that empower others. I too am always looking for more ideas about how to disengage from what others think about me–and other influences from our culture that aren’t in our best interest. That’s why I included the idea about thinking of my need to ever blame or make someone else wrong ultimately starts with me–and is there fore totally in my control to stop at any time. If we can get to a point where we take full responsibility for that–then we have just empowered ourselves to let it go and move on. I’ve been playing with the idea all week that when I find myself thinking about others in any relationship to myself–I bring it back to myself and consider MY relationship to myself first and that immediately disengages any thoughts to what others are doing or not doing in relationship to me.
Okay, so you probably didn’t expect THIS big a reply to your comment 🙂 I probably should just write another blog post about it! And it sound like I should come over and read YOUR current blog post before I go any further! Hope you have a great day and thanks again for popping by! ~Kathy
I really like the nexting idea, and it’s probably why I like to set lists and goals.
However, the whole Law of Attraction really doesn’t sit right with me. It’s probably because I see it attached to people wanting shiny cars and big houses, rather than more right sized life goals (and things more intrinsic) which I know you’d agree to.
Hi Sarah! Happy New Year! Thanks for coming back and making a comment! And I actually agree that if you take the Law of Attraction merely from the perspective of the movie “The Secret” then it comes across as very self-serving and superficial. That’s why I admitted to Lyle in my other comment that neither Thom nor I actually liked the movie at all. By the time it came out we had been studying similar ideas from a much deeper and altruistic perspective (and yes there is one!) and The Secret seemed to put all it’s focus on “getting” rather than giving. And like you said it talked endlessly about shiny cars, big houses and “stuff.”
But as I said in the post (or at least I hope I communicated that!) there is something eternal behind the Law of Attraction that is actually present in just about every spiritual teaching on the planet. And maybe that is part of the reason that The Secret was so successful in spite of it’s obvious flaws. People may be resonating to something deeper, even if it never explains what. I am not at all interested in “using” the Law of Attraction to accumulate more “stuff” in any way– I do believe that it allows us to attract the more intrinsic values we crave just as well. Plus, the new book “The Vortex” is really all about relationships–how to co-create the best ones, how we interact with each other and much more. There hasn’t been one shiny car or big house mentioned at all so far! 🙂
My primary objective here on SMART Living is to offer ideas and suggestions that have the potential to lead people to a happier, more peaceful and content life. But I would never dare to tell people that there is only one way, let alone one RIGHT way. And I love people to think and consider things in a new way–even if they ultimately reject them as undoable for themselves. Thank you for being honest about how you feel about the LOA and how that doesn’t sit right with you and for also saying that NEXTing sits better. You might also like the W.A.I. approach for what it offers. I’m hoping that one or two of all I list is helpful to people. Regardless though…I’m hoping each of us finds what we need to make 2014 OUR BEST YEAR EVER! ~Kathy
Kathy, Great encouragement with some proven ideas! I need constant reminding of these concepts! from Nancy@NancyLandrum.com
Hi Nancy! Yes, I figured that I was speaking to the choir on some of this! But like you said, reminders are really important. And isn’t it great that we can continually remind each other of some of these tried-and-true ideas? Hope your New Year is off to a great start and that you’re joining me in making 2014 your BEST YEAR EVER! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy…I hear ya!
As long as something works for you, regardless of what others may think, then that’s all that matters 🙂
I originally loved The Secret and still do…but then I caught up with Think And Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill and quickly realized that the message was exactly the same with the exception of taking action. The movie glanced over the taking action part while Hill’s book is all about wanting something, then working on achieving it.
I still watch The Secret every now and then to give me a little boost so who am I to say anything!?
“Of course I also consider you, and every other great blogger I follow, to be one of my “teachers.”” – Wow…I am deeply honored and of course, the feeling is mutual 🙂
Take care and my best to all.
Lyle
Hey Lyle…yeah I sorta debated whether I should even mention The Secret to be honest. I really didn’t get into the movie because I thought it only focused on the “material rewards” of the whole thing rather than the heartfelt deeper picture. But I do know that it helped introduce 1,000s to the idea and how can that be less than beneficial? I think those of us who’ve studied and gotten into all of this line of thinking realize that there is so much more to it if we keep applying the principals and seeing it out-pictured in our lives in a good way. So as you say, if anything gives us a “boost” and helps us feel better about our lives and the world…that’s got to be good right? Thanks for adding your valued perspective! ~Kathy
Hey Kathy and thanks for a great and inspiring post!!
I love all your ideas and while I am not a huge fan of the Hicks’, I do believe in The Law of Attraction and have done so throughout my entire life…even when I didn’t know what I could do had a name, never mind a whole movement!!
With that said, I truly feel that 2014 will be my best year yet and will do what I can to make that statement a reality 🙂
Take care and my best to all.
Lyle
Hi Lyle. Happy New Year! Thanks for joining in the conversation. Yeah, I know there has been controversy over the Hicks and their work, but I still have to admit that some of it makes a lot of sense and is helpful to me where I’m at right now. As a long time student of New Thought I’ve seen quite a few “gurus” come and go due to indiscretions and actions–but ultimately I tend to believe like I said in the post that something is either helpful or it isn’t. And while I’ve heard about the concepts and ideas about attraction for years and years, something about the way I heard it this time really works for me. I’m hoping that it will take my practice to a deeper level than ever before and that’s all I can ask of any teacher. Of course I also consider you, and every other great blogger I follow, to be one of my “teachers.” When I focus on the quality of my connection and vibration I can learn something from everyone! Thanks for stopping by and declaring that this year will be “YOUR BEST YEAR EVER!” ~Kathy
I love this post. I can’t wait to hear how 2014 turns out for you. I truly believe it’s going to be a fantastic year!!
I definitely believe in the law of attraction. I seem to have the best luck when I set goals, and go after attaining them without worry of the what if’s or how it’s supposed to play out.. If I get too wrapped up in how things will happen, everything seems to just stop. Once I let go and have confidence that things will just work themselves out, amazing things do happen. 🙂
Hi Wendy! Happy New Year to you! I’m not at all surprised that you’re into the law of attraction because you are always so positive and generous with your time and talents. As long as we can continually remember that the good we put out into the Universe will always be returned to us–how can most things not work out? And I appreciate you pointing out about letting go of the worry. As you say whenever we focus on worry, “everything seems to just stop.” And while it is fairly easy to be distracted by things that seem worrisome or don’t look that good, I so agree that when we “have confidence that things will just work themselves out, amazing things do happen.” Thanks again for stopping by. I’m like you—I believe it will be a fantastic year for us both! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy,
I just love the idea of nexting. In fact, I think part of my general malaise at the very start of 2014 was tied to me having completed my huge goal of 2013. I kept thinking, what’s next??? To the point, unfortunately, that it became a stressor. When I saw that there was a quick/short challenge in the detox/cleanse program, it gave me something to look forward to and drive towards. It’s been a rough week, but super rewarding. And as I come to the end of it, I’m now thinking, what’s next?, in the most positive and optimistic of ways!
~nancy
Hi Nancy! Yes isn’t NEXTing great? It is Thom’s favorite too and ever since we learned about it we make it part of our conversation all the time. It’s also a really friendly way to say, “Hey, don’t talk about that negative stuff (like news, politics, snarky people at work, etc.)! Instead we just redirect the conversation with, “So, what should we NEXT now?” And that makes us laugh AND turn the conversation around.
And Nancy, I continue to admire your ability to challenge yourself in such healthy ways. Keep up the good work and resist the urge to strangle your husband! ~Kathy