A week ago I turned 60. And while the number sounds much older than I feel, I am also extremely aware of how great my life is at the same time. In fact, thinking back I am hyperaware of how much my life has improved during the last 30 years. But how can that be? In a culture obsessed with youth, is it possible that we’ve all been mislead about what happens as we age? Or maybe those of us who have lived to midlife and beyond stay too silent about the benefits? Either way, now is a good time to let those who follow know that not only can we get better as we age, but life itself can be more sweet, meaningful and SMART as it goes along.
Here are the top ten ways my life has improved at age 60:
1) I am content with being me. Maybe some people know who they are at 30 but I sure didn’t. Looking back I doubt I even knew what I didn’t know. Sure we all have attachments, opinions and perspectives but are they ours, or just products of our education, influences and upbringing? After 60 years of living I’ve embraced and discarded enough to know what is really me and what isn’t. And while I’ll never stop growing and learning, the me that I’ve found at 60 is at peace.
2) My writing is satisfying and purposeful. I started writing in my late twenties with far more doubt than talent. After writing for over 30 years and suffering the highs and lows of the creative life, I finally claim the right to call myself a writer. While room to grow and develop continues to expand, right here, right now is a really good place to be.
3) I’m healthier now than I was then. In a culture obsessed with youth it is easy to equate good health to age. Wrong. At 30 I smoked cigarettes, never used sunscreen, drank sodas every day, ate masses of red meat, and consumed carbs like there was no tomorrow. Thankfully my body hasn’t held such poor treatment against me (at least too much!) Thanks to a much-improved diet, regular exercise and an active mind, my vitality, stamina and optimism doesn’t even compare.
4) My relationship and friendship with my husband is 100 times better. At 30, Thom and I had been married for eight years. Even though I loved him and our relationship was reasonably good, I had no idea at the time that our connection could grow as wide and deep as it is today. Words fall short of explaining this, but I am aware that who I am and what I have become all link back to my love and friendship with the man I met and married 38 years ago.
5) My finances are 1,000 times better. As entrepreneurs, Thom and I have been self-employed our entire married lives. At 30 we lived hand-to-mouth and while we still managed some fun and adventures, the stress of constantly wondering where money to pay bills would come from was stressful and problematic. Now completely debt-free at 60, we have honed our crafts and our consciousness enough so that money is not an issue in our lives.
6) I love where I live and don’t crave living somewhere else. Thom and I met, married and lived in Colorado for much of our life before 30. Even though it is a beautiful state with many benefits, it wasn’t where we longed to be. We’ve also lived in a big city and that didn’t suit us either. After living in several states and nearly two dozen homes, we’ve finally arrived at a place and community that fits us. While we still love to travel and explore new locations, we’ve finally found our “place.”
7) I don’t crave things that I don’t have. At 30 I was still hypnotized by our cultural belief that more money and stuff would make me happy. I wanted a bigger house, a nicer car, and all sorts of stuff that others had. Now 30 years later I realize that all that stuff does NOT lead to happiness and that meaning, peace of mind and loving connections are what really matter.
8) I’m much better able to be in and enjoy the moment. At thirty I was a maniac about doing and seeing as much as humanly possible. Yet, I was so busy running to the next “thing” that I hardly even remembered the last experience. It was as though I were convinced that if I didn’t do it all, and didn’t do it right now, I would never ever get another chance. At 60 I finally realize the gift in the moment right now in front of me. Priceless.
9) I am far less controlled by the wants, needs and expectations of others, and now live more with the guidance of my own soul. I spent a lot of time trying to please others at age 30—my friends, my family and yes, even Thom. What I’ve gradually learned is that you can’t change anyone else or get anyone else to love you (let alone like you) if they don’t want to. At 60 it is clear that I can only change myself and as for love, that too is an inside job.
10) I am at peace about my understanding of Life, God and where I fit in the Universe. Fortunately I was raised in religiously open-minded home so didn’t carry much baggage around with me in that department. But at 30 I didn’t really know what I believed. Now after years of contemplation, hundreds of books, hours of study, and with the help of many admired people, I have pieced together my own understanding of a benevolent Universe and where I fit in it All.
Far too often I hear people my age talk about the downfalls of aging. And of course, it would be pointless to deny there are some. But let’s face it, there are just as many disadvantages to youth as well. So instead of focusing on all the negatives that are possible, maybe it’s time and SMART that we all started talking about the rewards of getting older. Perhaps when we start valuing age as a gift with often-unappreciated benefits, those younger than us will recognize it as well. Then when someone says, “I just turned 60,” others will exclaim, “Oh, how awesome for you!!!”
Hi Kathy
Belated birth day wishes. Last July I have turned 65. What sorts of concepts you have about life, I have the same.This ageing does not deter me. I am enjoying good health, since I do not have the habit of smoking and drinking. I am well qualified in indian Accounts, Finance, & Taxation. Still I am working in a senior level position in corporate sector. My wants and needs are not very much. As you are , I am also “Far less controlled by the wants, needs and expectations of others”. I have not retired , because I love working, I love being active. 40 years of happy married life. More bonding. I asked my wife also to be active to overcome the feeling of ageing. She has taken up marketing of kitchenware products, though in a small way. Now she has a large circle of ladies as her customers and friends.Her mobile is constantly ringing and she is busy. At home, my sons and daughters-in-law are employed. Why should I sit at home alone, wasting my professional qualifications and domain knowledge. I have fullest satisfaction of working, because, now I am earning for my next generations -for my sons, for my daughters-in-law and for my grandkids. But there is some sadness that some of my old friends have died. Let us not be swept away by the feeling of ageing. As you have rightly coined the word “SMART Living 365 “, let us live smartly 24x7x365
Prashanth
Hi Prashanth! Welcome to SMART Living and thank you for sharing your thoughts on aging in a positive way. It sounds like you ARE living SMART 365x24x7 already! And as you say, “why should I sit at home along, wasting my professional qualifications…I have fullest satisfaction …” isn’t that what we all hope to experience? And yes, we do miss those who have passed on, but staying positive about our future is good for us and everyone around us. Thanks again for adding to this conversation. ~Kathy
Thank you for this inspirational post! I am 55 years old and have been expriencing a time of reevaluation of my life. I am moving from the idea of what I am missing (youth) to what I am gaining (basically your awesome list)!
I haven’t reached a place of balance yet, but I realize for the second half of my life to be meaningful, I need to be purposeful and appreciative of what I have….not what I do not have!!!
I plan to follow your blog for encouragment and ideas in my life’s journey.
Thank you!
Hi Colleen! And welcome to SMART Living and thanks for your comment. I am so glad that you found this post inspiring and that I’ve been able to show you that things really can get better. Sure there are some trade-offs (aren’t there with anything?) but it is so worth it. Let’s not let anyone tell us it doesn’t. ~Kathy
Happy 60th birthday!!! Will surely remember the above as I choose to grow old graciously. 38years in marriage, that’s super awesome!! Wish you many more sweet memories with Thom.
Hi Agric! Thank you for your birthday good wishes! I am having an AWESOME birthday year for sure 🙂 ~Kathy
Very inspirational post. I’m in my 30’s. I’m not going to afraid of getting old anymore. Thank you!
Hi Ann! Welcome to SMART Living and thanks for your comment. Just know you have such an amazing life ahead of you…and the only way to get there is to age. ~Kathy
Kathy, this post is complete inspiration for getting older. I think this muct be one of the best things to look forward to: “I am far less controlled by the wants, needs and expectations of others, and now live more with the guidance of my own soul.” Love it!
Hi Clinton! Welcome to SMART Living! I am so glad that you find my “tips” helpful. If anything I’m hoping I can inspire others to look forward to the experience instead of dreading it–right? Thanks so much for leaving a comment! ~Kathy
What a superbly written gorgeous piece. So glad I stopped by. What an inspiration! #midlifeluv
Hi Prabs! Welcome to SMART Living and thank you for sharing some of your enthusiasm with us. Yes to #midlifeluv! ~Kathy
I agree with you entirely. In fact, looking back, the age of 60 was the best in my life. 70 is not so bad either, but from then on, I found dissatisfaction with my body. I know; we can’t live forever. So enjoy your ‘youth’, lovely Kathy.
Hi Francene! Welcome to SMART Living and thank you for jumping in here with your experience of aging. I know we are all different and of course will experience things differently because of it, but I sure plan to do my best to focus on what’s good and sort of ignore the other. Plus I think it is valuable to remember that any of us can have health issues at any age so that doesn’t HAVE to mean that things get worse…just different. Being happy with the different is the challenge. ~Kathy
Loved your post. Ditto all the way. Life is really amazing in the second half isn’t it! Good to link up with you.
Hi Gilly! Welcome to SMART Living 365 and for your enthusiasm. Let’s continue to encourage each other right? There is so much left to live why on Earth would we do otherwise? Thanks for your comment. ~Kathy
Happy 60th birthday! I’m two years further along on that journey called life. I have mixed feelings because I am a long distance caregiver for an 87 year old mother in law. And, my brother in law’s mother in law fell earlier this year (82), suffered a TBI and is in not-a-very-good-place right now. She may never recover, either, after several setbacks. When I see this going on I really wonder about aging. On the other hand, I agree with so much you blogged about. I’ll just have to reconcile my mixed feelings. The alternative to aging is truly something I DO NOT want.
Hi Alana! It sounds like you have some very painful examples of aging in your life right now and that makes it difficult. I think any time we lose sight of all the good things in any situation, it is much harder. Both of my parents have passed on several years ago so that reminder isn’t right in front of me. Plus, Thom has several clients that he works with regularly that are in their 90s and still going strong. They are sharp, active and relatively healthy–and perfect examples of how I want to be when I get that age. Keeping people like that in mind and constantly reminding me that just because I was younger I still had “challenges” helps me to remember that life can be good no matter what. I honestly believe that every age comes with its own difficulties and how we choose to navigate them is largely up to us.
With that said, we are all going to find out how the rest of our life goes and making sure we make the most of it while we can, as joyfully as we can, is a primary motivation of mine. ~Kathy
I love your list! You defined most of my life with it. It is funny to realize that I take such better care of my body now than I did in my youth. The rewards are worth it!
So happy to have you as part of the MidLifeLuv Link-Up!
Kimberly
http://FiftyJewels.com
Hi Kimberly! Thanks for stopping by from the Link-Up Party! And yes, when I thought about it in so many ways I’m healthier now than I ever was then….all I had was the benefit of youth. And as the saying goes, “youth is wasted on the young!” Let’s keep sharing the news that life can just get better and better! ~Kathy
People are always surprised when I say that every year gets better but for me it does. I think it has a lot to do with defining what content or happy is and what you really need to achieve it. I love this post. It breaks the preconceived notion that after a certain age we feel like the best is behind us. It is not. There is much to look forward to. Thank you so much for linking to #MidLifeLuv and Happy Belated Birthday Kathy!
Hi Elana! Thanks for dropping by and leaving the link to your Linkup Party! They are always such a great way to find new bloggers and catch up on some of the other thoughts going around out here in cyberspace! And good for you for knowing that life can get better and better as we go along! Let’s all help spread the word! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy,
Happy Birthday and welcome to the over 60 crowd. There’s a certain freedom that comes as we mature and especially at this age. It sounds like you did everything right in your life and I’m glad you’ve found peace in being yourself. It’s so important.
Hi Rebecca! Thanks for the birthday wishes. And I can only WISH that I had done everything “right” in my life, but at least I’ve done my best to learn from my mistakes. And while I’m pretty happy with how far I’ve come, I’m can’t wait to see what comes next. Thanks again for your comment. ~Kathy
Kathy,
I absolutely love this post. Funny enough I am 30 this year, but your post inspired me to keep living life with purpose and making the most out of the greatness we are blessed with each day. Happy 60 years to you and definitely keep rocking!
Bob
Hi Bob! Thanks for the birthday wishes. And wow…if you are just 30 you have so VERY MUCH to look forward to! And it sounds like you know that a very important part of a great life is to remember to feel blessed every single day. ~Kathy
Did you write this . . . or did I? What a wonderful piece on the benefits of aging!
Hi Maura! I’m sorry you got caught in my spam blocker but this one did make it through. And I’m so glad you liked this post. I’ll bet all of us could come up with something similar if we spent time thinking about it. ~Kathy
I adore this post! So glad I found you. I started blogging as I approached 60 with trepidation. It has enriched my life beyond measure and I am looking forward to 65 next month!
b
Hi Barbara! Welcome to SMART Living 365. I LOVE your blog name–especially because I’ve joined the 60 crowd now 🙂 And I’m thrilled to hear it just keeps getting better and better! Happy early birthday to you! ~Kathy
Happy Birthday all year long! I turn 60 in 2016. I’ll be spending time in Portugal with my penpal of 50 yrs. Life truly is what you make of it and I wouldn’t trade the life satisfaction of this age for youth. I was always inspired by a piece written by Andy Rooney, who said “As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few of the reasons why:
1) A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, “What are you thinking?” She doesn’t care what you think.
2) A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a damn what you might think about her or what she’s doing.
3) If a woman over 30 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And it’s usually something more interesting. ”
I think you could exchange 60 for 30. There’s more to his musings but these are the 3 that resound with me. It’s not so much that the mature woman doesn’t care about others as that she cares about herself and is able to finally put herself first without fretting about what others think.
Hi Mona! Thanks for the birthday wishes! And happy early birthday to you…it sounds like an awesome plan. And thanks also for the stuff from Andy Rooney. I agree that those things would certainly apply to me more at 60 than they did at 30 but maybe he was making allowances for our youth focused culture. Actually, I didn’t have any of those things when I was 30 and didn’t really know many women who did. Of course, I do think lots of women might “say” they did, but like so many things, we don’t really know what we don’t know until we do. As you say, “I wouldn’t trade the life satisfaction of this age for youth.” Thanks for the great input! ~Kathy
Thanks for the great post! Getting older has been a difficult concept for my head to embrace. But I’m getting to the place where my life is making sense to me. I’m doing what I love, my son is grown, and I do believe these can be the best years of my life. Keep up the inspiration!
Hi Vera! Welcome to SMART Living and I’m glad you liked the post. I think a real key to being happier with our age is taking the time to focus on and be grateful for those things right in front of you. As you say, remembering you get to do what you love, your son is grown and all the other good things I’m sure are in your life can keep your thoughts there. Thanks for your comment. ~Kathy
I just adore this. I am immeasurably happier at 45 and I was at 25. I plan to continue this trajectory 🙂
Hi Carla! Good for you for realizing that you are just getting better and better as you age. Definitely stay on that trajectory no matter what! ~Kathy
I enjoyed reading every part of it thanks alot for sharing.Age indeed its just a number.
Hi Joseph! Welcome to SMART Living 365 and I hope this inspired you to remember that life can get better and better no matter what your age. ~Kathy
Happy belated Birthday, Kathy! Whenever anyone complains of aging, I remind them of the alternative. 🙂
Every day I’m alive, healthy and continuing to dream and grow is a good one!
Hi Nancy! Thanks for the birthday wishes! I’m actually celebrating all year so it’s not “belated” at all! Yes to us all staying, ” alive, healthy and continuing to dream and grow.” ~Kathy
I just love the strong feeling of fulfillment that oozes from your article. Happy belated birthday. Here’s to even more fulfillment, happiness and good health as you move forward.
Hi Ali! Thank you! I hope if nothing else I can prove to others that age is just like so much else in life–we can choose to see the good and focus on that–or we can choose what so many others decide to do. I’m looking forward to my future and hope others do as well. Thanks for the encouragement! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy ! Happy Birthday to you – thank you for sharing such a lovely post, enjoyed reading every bit of it and agree with you all that you said, thanks for inspiring me today !
Hi G Angela! Thanks for the birthday wishes! And I’m glad you appreciated the sentiment I wanted to share with others both older and younger! Doesn’t it always seem to boil down to choosing between seeing the good or seeing everything else? And THANK YOU for inspiring me all the time on your blog and FB page! ~Kathy
Happy birthday, Kathy. I am in agreement, the older I get the better life is. I would never go back to an earlier age if it were possible. Like you I am more comfortable with myself, have less concern for what others think and no longer find myself trying to fit in or be accepted.
Hi Lois! Thanks for the birthday wishes…and I’m so glad you too agree that life can just get better and better instead peaking somewhere (midlife) and then sliding downhill from there. I certainly haven’t reached a peak and I’m betting you haven’t either. As far as I’m concerned my “peak” will be my last breath here on Earth and then I’ll just fly on to something elsewhere! ~Kathy
Oh how awesome for you Kathy! I am in agreement. 60 seemed so old when I was a kid, now of course I know it is not !
Hi Haralee! 🙂 (You GOT it!) And yes, isn’t it true that when we were young 60 did sound so very OLD and that perspective has certainly changed. Then again, maybe it’s time for all of us to show how vibrant and alive we can be regardless of our age? Join me? ~Kathy
Happy birthday, and how TRULY awesome for you! You are in a fantastic place in your life. I wish you many more years of peace and joy.
Hi Laura! Thanks for the birthday wishes and I certainly wish the same peace and joy for you and all people everywhere. While our experiences are likely different the elements that make life matter are usually mostly the same. ~Kathy
I could not agree more with the general principle here. Not everything in my life is that together, but I’m much more calm about things. I know what matters.
Hi Carol! Thank you. I agree that not everything is always perfect all the time but overall I think if we make a conscious decision to seek it out, most of the time the good outweighs the bad. And how’s the saying go? I might not be all that I can be but if you’ve seen where I’ve been you’d know I’ve come a long, long way! And as you say, just “knowing” what matters is worthy of celebration! ~Kathy
Happy Birthday Kathy! I have found this peace just in the last year or so. I am finally at a place in my life where I don’t crave “more”. I am content with my life and the way I have lived it and now just want to enjoy every single day of it.
Hi Rena! Thanks for the birthday wishes and I am so glad that you’ve found a place of peace these days. As a ongoing caregiver you have quite a challenge on your hands, but you never seem to loose your optimism and anticipation for the future. That’s what can make us wilt in life, and it doesn’t matter what age we are right? ~Kathy
I loved this post!! So fun and inspiring … now I can’t wait to be 60! I’m not even joking, you make it sound totally rad. <3
Hi Sarah! Thank YOU for making my day. If I had any intention with this post it was to inspire other young women to look forward to aging instead of dreading it. YAY! 🙂 Trust me, you have so much to look forward to and it does get better as long as we continue to look for the good. ~Kathy
Yes, yes and yes! Without a doubt this is the best time in my entire life, and yet I still have my doubts about so many things. Live and learn! Some day our house will be finished….
Hi Laura Lee! Thanks for popping in here and confirming what an awesome time of life this can be. Doubts? Of course! But that doesn’t mean things can’t be great right? You and your husband have been putting yourself out there in a new and challenging way so I’m sure there have been a few tough moments. But as Thom and I like to ask ourselves, “what else have you got to do?” Sitting around waiting to deteriorate is not an option. Let’s continue to make the very best of it!!! ~Kathy
I have been enjoying your posts quite a bit. This one in particular truly speaks to me. I agree wholeheartedly with your list. I feel that when you get to a place where you can see things in this type of a light it is an incredible gift. The essence of what living is really all about. So many things are overblown and stressed over, but in the bigger picture, it just doesn’t matter. True happiness comes from the little things. An appreciation of what is around you and what is in your life presently. Just had to comment and say I loved this article!
Hi Wendy! So glad you liked the post. I pretty sure I’ve read on your blog that you’ve faced a number of challenges lately and while that can certainly make it harder to “see the good” I also know you do a very good job with it. I like how you say, “So many things are overblown and stressed over, but in the bigger picture, it just doesn’t matter,” and I would say that getting to the place where we know what is important is SO very important regardless of our age. Yes to knowing that “true happiness comes from the little things.” Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. ~Kathy
Thank you for this lovely portrayal of how you’ve grown and gotten to be the awesome woman yoiu are. You are blessed!
Hi Katie! Glad you like the post. I do believe I have been incredibly blessed. But I am also hoping that I can remind everyone (my self included) that we always have a choice about what we focus on…the good stuff or the not so good stuff. And age is definitely one of those things. Let’s continue to spread the good word! ~Kathy
Hi Kathy – happy belated birthday! And I agree with all of your points – getting older has a lot going for it when you find your “sweet spot” and accept yourself and love your life. So glad to have found your blog and to share your world view 🙂
Hi Leanne! Thanks for the birthday wishes! I’m accepting them all year long–why? Because I can! 🙂 I’m glad too that we’ve connected through our blogs and looking forward to seeing where we BOTH go in the years to come. ~Kathy
I think you captured the dilemma around aging–when we value aging as a gift–Yes. If we’re bad mouthing growing old and ourselves, telling sad stories, and carrying on about wrinkles, aches,…whatever, we’re selling the wrong story. I find that being upbeat and open about my age is the way to go. No one’s walked away or closed a door on me.
Your revelations are great examples of viewing that place in time as one to be cherished, not dreaded! And, again–Happy Birthday.
Hi Walker! I know you and I are walking this road at about the same time. And from everything you are doing and your fearlessness about stepping into your future are all inspiring to the rest of us. I want to be exactly the same. Let’s continue to show others how amazing life can be at any age! ~Kathy